Conflict Resolution

Conflict Resolution “Your perception is your reality”

Conflict Resolution Conflict Resolution is defined as resolving the differences of opinions

Conflict Resolution • Almost on a daily basis, there are arguments, disagreements or conflicts among staff and that also includes management. It is indeed a part of human nature to disagree as no one person can see one point exactly the same way. How we choose to deal with these conflicts will depend on several issues.

Conflict Resolution These issues include the following - • Your upbringing (how you were raised) • What you learnt through examples set by your parents, teachers, or your peers, etc • Your life experiences (conflicts you have dealt with in the past and what these experiences have taught you)

Conflict Resolution • The Carnegie Foundation discovered that to be successful on the job, relational skills are far more important than knowledge. Its research found that only 15% of a person’s success is determined by job knowledge and technical skills whereas 85% is determined by an individual’s attitude and ability to relate to other people.

Conflict Resolution How do you handle conflicts at the workplace? • Do you ignore them • Get defensive • Blame it on someone or something else

Conflict Resolution There are far better ways to handling conflicts and these are a few tips – ~ Don’t assume that people readily see the picture you are presenting ~ Make the same point a different way

Conflict Resolution ~ Look for the real source of the anger ~ Problems seldom exist at the level at which they are discussed, don’t be afraid to dig ~Everyone has a different opinion or view, respect it ~ Understand that anger itself is not destructive

Conflict Resolution ~ Talk about your feelings before you get angry ~ Don’t raise your voice – It’s amazing how issues can be resolved in a whisper. To communicate in a whisper greatly diminishes the level of anger in any communication ~ Don’t stockpile – Don’t bring issues from the past into present arguments. Deal with the present issues at hand.

Conflict Resolution ~ Don’t threaten team members and don’t take every argument as a threat to your job ~ Don’t avoid your anger ~ Walk your talk – do not adopt a “Do as I say not as I do” mentality ~ Consider how you say and what you say

Conflict Resolution ~ Create a process for resolving problems without anger ~ No abuse, either verbal or physical is ever allowed ~ Don’t engage or allow someone to pull you into an argument – it takes two to argue ~ Listen to your body

Conflict Resolution How do you manage staff conflict? • Set a proper tone for the meeting – Call the disputing parties together in a neutral area, free of distractions. • Do not show a bias towards any individual’s point of view – If you show sympathy with one of the parties, the other will lose trust in the process and stop sharing openly.

Conflict Resolution • Keep the discussion focused on the issue athand– If participants begin to ramble or drift off the topic, gently guide them back. • Probe for the root cause of the conflict – Even substantive disagreements are often fueled by personal differences. Address the personal issues first

Conflict Resolution • Do not ignore emotions – Behind every dispute there are real emotions such as hurt, anger, and betrayal. While you should not dwell on the emotions involved, it is important to acknowledge that they exist.

Conflict Resolution • Work with the parties to explore ways they can both come out winners – Focus on common goals as well as the potential negative impact on the individuals if the conflict is not resolved • Follow up – If the conflict is significant, don’t expect miracles overnight, but look for indications that the individuals are acting on the agreed plan and taking steps forward.

Conflict Resolution What is criticism? • It can be defined as the assessment, evaluation, critique or account of a particular situation, person, place, thought or thing.

Conflict Resolution There are two types of criticisms – they are constructive and destructive criticisms • Constructive criticism is the type of criticism that is not mean-spirited and is given with the intent that the receiver would learn from the comments and improve on their behaviour/attitude/skills.

Conflict Resolution • Destructive criticism is the type of criticism that is mean-spirited and it is given with the intent to hurt, discourage, and to mentally injure an individual. This is usually given out of spite, envy, jealousy or dislike.

Confliction Resolution • If you have received some criticism do not hesitate to assess the type that you have been given and the possible motives behind what was stated. As individuals, we should learn how to react to criticism regardless of the type of criticism given.

Conflict Resolution • How do you handle criticism? Here are a few tips - ~ Don’t take it personally ~ Strive to learn from the words given as criticism ~ Don’t critique the critic

Conflict Resolution ~ Don’t be defensive ~ Accept that many people focus only on negatives ~ Realize that vicious, harsh comments come from those people, who are unhappy Criticism is often nothing more than reflection of personal preferences

Conflict Resolution • Conflict does not have to result in negativity, it can be a road to a greater understanding. • Regardless of the type of criticism given, you must always try to find the good in it • Beware of office politics, it can also cause conflict in the workplace

Can you Survive Working with Human Beings? • What kind of co-worker are you? Are people excited to work on projects with you or do they cringe inside instead? • With your handout, please find a self assessment quiz by Ms.Gini Graham Scott PhD. The author of A Survival Guide for Working with Humans: Dealing with Whiners, Back-Stabbers, Know-It-Alls, and other difficult people.

Reflections • A fall in a ditch makes you wiser • You are never too old to learn • It is not what you are called but what you answer to • If you offend, ask for pardon; if offended forgive • Rain does not fall on one roof alone • A clear conscience is a good pillow

Conflict Resolution