Positive Confrontation Skills

1. Buddy Bonner bonnerb@lisd.net Central Zone Leader November 16, 2011 Positive Confrontation Skills

2. Positive Confrontation Skills When working with people, leaders face conflict of some sort on a daily basis. We do not all agree all the time! Additionally, as school based leaders working with students, parents and staff members, myriad opportunities for conflict or disagreement exist on a daily basis. As leaders, several question arise regarding conflict: • How can we establish a culture that diminishes conflict? • What should we do when conflict emerges? • What strategies work best to diffuse or resolve conflicts?

3. Positive Confrontation Skills Objectives • Discuss effective strategies used to address confrontations in a positive and productive manner. • Role play scenarios to implement confrontation reduction strategies.

4. Positive Confrontation Skills How should I prepare for this meeting? I am afraid it might be difficult.

5. Positive Confrontation Skills • Decide if you have “it”—the ability to supervise people and programs • Know when to get involved • Know the “facts” from all perspectives • Approach the issue from a service or helping perspective • Use “common” sense • Maintain objectivity • Know what you want to accomplish with the meeting • Documentation or not? If you believe documentation is necessary, work with a supervisor on your incident report. • Have a plan and write it out on a note card

6. Positive Confrontation Skills What should I do during the meeting?

7. Positive Confrontation Skills • Use your note card to guide the meeting • Follow the plan…unless the unexpected occurs • Stay focused on what you want to accomplish • Have your documents orderly and accessible • Maintain safety • Use “common” sense • Be respectful • Speak persuasively and not abrasively • Do not get emotional • Expect participants to be emotional • Do not argue • Listen….then listen some more • Ask questions to clarify • Develop an action plan for after the meeting if appropriate • Be flexible and do not paint yourself into a corner • Know when to terminate a meeting and get a supervisor for assistance

8. Positive Confrontation Skills How should I follow up with the employee after the meeting?

9. Positive Confrontation Skills • Adhere to the action plan • Complete the documentation necessary • Monitor the situation • Address any ongoing deficiencies • Be prepared to make a tough decision if problems continue

10. Positive Confrontation Skills Role Playing Activity • Gossiping Employees • Meeting with Upset Parents • Working with Difficult Staff Members • Addressing Dress Code Issues • Counseling Employees on Attendance

11. Positive Confrontation Skills Resource List How to Win Friends and Influence People—Dale Carnegie Lincoln on Leadership—Donald Phillips Crucial Conversations—Kerry Patterson, et. al. Crucial Confrontations—Kerry Patterson, et. Al Good to Great—Jim Collins

12. Positive Confrontation Skills Questions?