Presentation Transcript

1. finding Your Voice FEARDOESN’T LIVE HERE By Angel Shannon
2. FINDING YOUR VOICE Common Questions Where did my fear-based thinking start? Why can’t I get rid of this fear? What is on the other side of fear? How do I find my confidence? How do I release my fear of speaking up and keep that feeling?
3. ~INTRODUCTION~ As a little girl, common phrases to me were “If you’d shut up, you might learn something!” or “You just talk to hear yourself talk!” or the ever famous “Don’t say another word!” As a young adolescent, I pushed back by trying to own my own space. Not a move I would recommend as it did nothing but cause resentment and verbal standoffs at the dinner table. I had been punished often enough that it really didn’t even matter to me anymore. I was rebellious, indifferent, and looking back, I understand the pain I must have caused both of my parents. Fast forward to this day. I now own my own company, Tranquility Circle, and teach women that what you think, say and believe does matter! If you don’t speak up you are literally robbing the world of your Divine Brilliance! We all have it…but not all of us want to be heard or are ready to be. “Finding Your Voice” is a primer of sorts, dedicated to opening up your own unique “Point of Personal Expression.” The following excerpts are from my own experiences and triumphs over what I like to call the “Nobody Cares What I Have To Say” Syndrome. Read this book, feel it with all of your heart. ……Commitment to a peaceful life begins with you…… With Love, (signature) e
4. What Stops you from speaking up? COMMON REASONS: You’re Afraid of Looking Stupid. If all the women in the world were afraid of looking stupid or being ridiculed, we would live in a one dimensional timeline filled with boredom and a flat-lined existence. Own your thoughts. Speak your thoughts and feelings with clarity and replace this imagined belief with “Everything starts with a thought and sharing is the action that brings the support I need.” What If You’re Wrong? So what if you are? Would that be the worst thing that could happen? The women who invented Liquid Paper, the square-bottomed paper sack, wipers and dishwashers all thought their ideas were questionable at best but, they had the courage to speak out and potentially mess up big! They held tight to their vision and manifested their dreams. You are no different. You can do whatever you dare to dream. Nobody Cares What I Have To Say. Guess what? It’s time to find a new group of listeners! If you feel like your words are invisible, they are! It’s because you’re talking to the wrong crowd. There ARE PEOPLE WAITING TO BE IMPRESSED by your abilities and observations. You have to show up, comfortable in your own skin and brave enough to share your words.
5. I will embarrass myself. In this time of social media mania, it’s true. We do have to be careful but I know from personal experience that embarrassment passes. It happens. It’s over. Don’t decide to let it become a roadblock to your own success. My clients often refer to this fear as way up on the list of “why” they don’t share their incredible ideas. When you conquer and alleviate your fear of embarrassment an entirely new Point of Personal Expression falls into your lap and you will blossom! I’m not a confident person. Confidence, Courage and Conviction. These are the Training Trifecta for Finding Your Voice and Speaking Your Truth. Take a close look at your confidence level and give it a strength number; 1 being the least confident and 10 the most. Now ask yourself if the reasons behind that number are currently true or are they leftovers from old habits that no longer serve your purpose. Whatever keeps YOU from speaking up is all about FEAR…and it simply cannot live here any longer. You have so much to say and so much to share…but then comes the self doubt,so why bother? BECAUSE YOU MATTER! COURAGE A lack of Fear CONFIDENCE A lack of Self-Doubt CONVICTION An absence of fear and self-doubt and a deep trust of your own worth.
6. OPEN UP AND BE HEARD! Each one of us contributes to the success of our lives. Notice I didn’t say failure. Why? Because there is no failure to be had, only experiences that enrich our lives. These moments come to you for continued growth! Connecting these experiences with failure is a sure bet that the important lesson your need to learn will not be received. You must HONOR YOUR EXPERIENCE. Before continuing, take a moment and bless your journey from a protected place of allowance. Understand that you are in no way obligated to stay in a place of quiet servitude and silent suffering. Your voice is a gift. It is a tool that will open opportunities yet to be discovered. It is the key that leads to releasing your fears and embracing your Divine Wisdom. “I write for those women who do not speak, for those who do not have a voice because they are so terrified, because we are taught to respect fear more than ourselves. We’ve been taught that silence would save us, but it won’t.” AudreLorde The World is an orchestra and your words are the melody. With practice, playing your own tune becomes simple and the music you express will fill your life with joy and peace.
7. FINDING YOUR VOICE Where did my fear based thinking start? Most likely, you’ve been hesitant to be heard for most of your life..possibly even lifetimes! These habits are usually rooted in a familial example. Perhaps your parents didn’t communicate well or your siblings teased you for saying “something stupid”. Classmates may have influenced whether or not you felt welcome to converse freely. Perhaps you were made fun of for sharing your thoughts, or even ridiculed for being open with some unconventional ideas! Fear has served you and kept you safe from embarrassment, teaching you it is ok to be uncomfortable with your own knowledge. These delicate impressions have become part of your subconscious. At some point you decided that speaking up wasn’t worth the risk. You chose to be silent, suppressing your own voice and you continue to make that choice. Remember the Key Word here: CHOICE Take time to recognize and question the source of your silence. RESOURCE: I remember being called “Chatty Cathy” as a little girl because I always had something to say. It didn’t matter whether it was right, wrong or otherwise, I wanted in on the conversation! It’s true, there are times when silence is the best gift of all, but when we are young it’s not something we tend to think about. Maybe you were called out to say a Thanksgiving Blessing or speak without preparation and those little voices inside your head told you that there was no doubt – you were going to blow it – and then…you did. Those moments imprint on our memories and now, when it’s your turn to speak, you freeze. It’s time to let go of those moments and FIND YOUR VOICE!
8. FEAR TRIGGERS What’s the trigger for my fears of being heard? Only you can answer this question but I’ll tell you how to figure it out. Pay attention to your Body, Mind and Spirit. Your responses will usually show up in this order: BODY: When you feel your heart rate increase, your blood pressure rising, your palms become sweaty and other physical manifestations of your fear, you’ve just hit on a trigger. Keep a journal and make notes on your body’s reaction to the potential of having to be vocal. MIND: Once your body starts stressing, you stop thinking clearly. Panic mode steps in and your breathing becomes more labored. You have a gazillion thoughts running through your head and none of them are positive. As we discussed before, you already know you will mess up. It’s a habitual thought process that scatters your wisdom into sentence fragments and incomplete statements. Breathe through this stage by envisioning a place of peace and comfort. SPIRIT: Your Spirit will always try to calm you, but the panic that you feel often drowns out the gentle guidance that you’re receiving. Close your eyes and give yourself a moment to rebalance. Be mindful and notice your 5 senses as well as your Body, Mind and Spirit Connection By journaling your physical responses, breathing mindfully, visualizing a positive outcome, and allowing your Spirit to enter it’s own “mode of calm”…you are well on your way to FINDINGYOUR VOICE!
9. Why can’t I get rid of this fear? Simply because you haven’t chosen to do so! Everyone is used to you not speaking up so why change it now? Releasing your fear of being heard means you have to let go of something that you’re very familiar with and it’s worked for years! You haven’t had to stand up in front of your church group or co-workers because you’ve convinced everyone, including yourself, that it’s probably not a good idea. You’re reading this information because you are searching for a way out. You are tired of being overlooked and ignored. You are exhausted with constant anxiety. Being fearful of speaking up has become part of who you are. It’s familiar. There’s no risk. But there’s also the inner knowing that you have answers – and you’re keeping them secret – just in case they’re wrong. Give yourself room to replace fears with new and positive attitudes about speaking up and sharing your story! RESOURCE: Meditation is an excellent tool for ridding yourself of all kinds of fear-based habits. If you are currently not meditating, please contact me for further discussion and I’ll introduce you to a practice that improves every facet of your life. You feel better, more rested, more in balance and aligned with your Higher Power. This ancient source of peace and calm will be very helping in releasing your fears so that you can FIND YOUR VOICE!
10. What’s on the other side of Fear? Relief. All of us are looking for some kind of relief. Perhaps relief from relationship issues or high stress demands at work. Maybe you’re searching for relief from financial challenges or, in this case, relief from the fear of being heard. I used to have a fear of speaking in public, which is ridiculous since I was always being called to do so! I learned to be very clever by writing notes on the same color paper as what I was wearing so they would be less noticeable. My heart was still pounding out of my chest and I was always worried about dropping my notes. What if they got out of order? However, I found relief and have never looked back. Relief by Belief: “Owning my Space” and take that one step towards the confidence to lose the notes and FIND YOUR VOICE! RESOURCE: On the other side of your fear is relaxation within each moment. You’ll find people really DO want to hear what you have to say and your contributions are invaluable. You can say a blessing, address a small crowd or even represent others by speaking on their behalf…and you’ll do it with confidence and joy. Lose your fear. It doesn’t serve you or others and any “shadow impressions” of past experiences are holding you captive. Release those negative expectations and FIND YOUR VOICE!
11. How do I find my confidence? Ask yourself what you’re good at. What makes you happy. Where does your confidence lie? It could be in the arts, organization, maybe research, cooking, how about decorating? Once you make a list of the topics you’re confident about, your competence and ability to speak about it will blossom! I am a big proponent of mantras and prompts. Mantras are short affirmations that can be said to yourself or out loud depending on your circumstances. They are repeated over and over to help you find balance during stressful situations. Examples might be: Prompts are simply reminders of your Divine Gift of Speech. Highly personal, they might come in the shape of a photo, a crystal or a talisman that fits easily into your pocket. These prompts bring you back to a place of comfort and peace. Perhaps you could make yourself a bracelet with the words “Speak My Truth” on the beads! Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy. - Dale Carnegie RESOURCE: Use mantras daily. For example: “I am confident in my ability to speak my truth” “I will deliver this message with words that inspire”“I am not alone and claim my space to speak freely” Start talking about your favorite topics, the ones that make you happy to discuss, the ones that you are confident enough to use specifically for the purpose of: FINDING YOUR VOICE!
12. How do I, once and for all, release my fear of speaking up? We’ve discussed quite a few ways to help you step into your truth and never look back. For your convenience I’ve listed the advice from each question on this page: Take time to recognize and question the source of your silence. Be mindful and notice your 5 senses as well as your Body, Mind and Spirit Connection Don’t be afraid to release your fears. Give yourself room to replace them with new and positive attitudes about speaking up and sharing your story! Relief by Belief: “Owning my Space” and take that one step towards the confidence to lose the notes. Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy. - Dale Carnegie Give yourself the Freedom to Breathe peacefully and Speak clearly. Clean your emotional and spiritual house of any doubt, guilt or lies that have long ago become a detriment to your success. You can do it. I know you can. Now you are ready to: FIND YOUR VOICE!
13. As an accomplished author, radio personality and stress management guru, Angel Shannon blasts through denial and lack of self-worth with breakthrough techniques that leave people confident and highly aware of their peaceful life. Because there are no cookie-cutter approaches, Angel and her organization, The Tranquility Circle, Inc., provide customized care and support to individuals and groups lifting people to all new levels of accomplishment and personal awareness. Angel offers successful "fear extractions" turning pressure and doubt into Graceful Courage. A 30-year industry veteran, Angel has hosted programs such as Inspired Conversations on AM630 K-Talk, has ongoing guest appearances on ABC4’s Good Things Utah, and currently wakes listeners up with positive energy on the legendary FM100.3 in Salt Lake City, Utah. To book a Free Discovery Appointment or Session http://www.tranquilitycircle.com/Contact/