Family & Domestic Violence

1. Family & Domestic Violence RWBell 03/01

2. Defining Domestic Violence 1 • Family & domestic violence is “a pattern of abuse and control by one person in an intimate relationship over another.” • [Billie Sargent Hatchell, Study Guide for Facilitators, “Broken Vows: Religious Perspectives on Domestic Violence, Parts I & II” (Seattle, WA: Center for the Prevention of Sexual & Domestic Violence, 1994), 8.] • “F & DV is where one partner uses direct or threatened physical, sexual, economic, or psychological violence in order to establish and maintain power over another person.” • [Domestic Violence and the Law, 1996 as cited by the Health Department of Western Australia; URL http://www.health.wa.gov.au/publications/dvpk_what.html.]

3. Domestic Abuse Includes: • Physical abuse • Sexual assault • Damage to person’s property • Threats to damage property • Verbal abuse and putdowns • Humiliation • Forced isolation from family & friends • Financial abuse -- withholding or controlling against your will: money, food, clothes, & personal items such as car keys or bankbook • Harassment such as constant phone calls to your work or home or repeated visits to your home or workplace

4. The Wheel of Power & Control

5. Some F & DV Statistics 1 • Prevalence • between 1-4 (some estimates, up to 8) million women experience a serious assault by an intimate partner each year. • Every 15 seconds a woman is physically assaulted in her home. • Nearly 1 in 3 adult women experience at least one physical assault by a partner during adulthood. • The average victim of DV will be physically abused three times per year. • Battering is the number one cause of injury to women in the U.S.; it accounts for more injury to women than rapes, muggings, and car accidents combined. • 2/3 of all women who are murdered die as a result of DV. • 20-45% of all injuries seen in ERs are the result of DV.

6. Some F & DV Statistics 2 • Prevalence, continued: • Of battered women who seek medical treatment, only 1 in 10 is identified as a battered woman by the ER physician/nurse. For primary care clinics, the number = 1 in 20. • 25-45% of all women are battered during pregnancy. The March of Dimes reports that more babies are born with birth defects as a result of their mother being battered during pregnancy than from the combination of all the diseases and illnesses for which we immunize pregnant women.

7. Some F & DV Statistics 3 • Race - DV is statistically consistent across racial & ethnic boundaries. • Age - any age. Most common: 19-29 years of age. Over age 46 least likely to be battered. • Battered Immigrant Women - may suffer higher rates of abuse than U.S. citizens because they come from cultures that accept DV, or because they have less access to legal & social services. They may believe that the penalties and protections of the U.S. do not apply to them (U.S. protection does apply).

8. Some F & DV Statistics 4 • Recidivism - 47% of men who beat their wives do so at least three times per year. • During the six months following an episode of DV, 32% of battered women are victimized again. • Short-term (6-12 week) psycho-educational batterer-intervention programs helped stop some immediate violence, but were ineffective in stopping abuse over time. Some batterers became more sophisticated in their psychological abuse and intimidation after attending such programs!

9. Some F & DV Statistics 5 • Children - are 1,500 times more likely to be abused in homes where partner abuse occurs. Seventy plus percent of men who batter their wives also sexually or physically abuse their children. When children are killed during a domestic dispute, 90% are under age 10; 56% are under age 2. • Children raised in violent homes are: • 6 times as likely to commit suicide • 26 times as likely to commit sexual assault • 57 times as likely to abuse drugs • 74 times as likely to commit other crimes against persons • (Anger is a primary issue to be addressed.)

10. Some F & DV Statistics 6 • Law Enforcement - Only about one-seventh of all DV assaults come to the attention of police. Women injured by an intimate partner reported the violence to the police only 55% of the time; even less likely to report violence when she was not injured. • Purchase/ownership of a gun/ammunition by anyone convicted of a misdemeanor DV offense is prohibited by federal law. • References: Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) which is part of the Violent Crime & Law Enforcement Act of 1994. Also, the Omnibus Consolidated Appropriations Act of 1997 which amended the Federal Gun Control Act of 1968. See Federal Gun Control Act, 18 U.S.C. § 922(g)(9).

11. Guns, Ammo, & DV Convictions • The 1994 VAWA and the 1997 Omnibus Consolidated Appropriations Act amendment adds domestic violence convictions to the “Brady checklist” sent to law enforcement for a background check prior to each handgun sale from a federally-licensed firearms dealer. • Also criminalizes the known transfer of a firearm to a person convicted of a qualifying DV misdemeanor. • Applies to all law enforcement officers & other governmental officials (including military personnel). Prohibition applies to any person who has ever been convicted of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence.

12. Guns, Ammo, & Restraining Orders • Persons subject to a valid civil restraining order from any state are prohibited from possession of guns or ammo while the order is in effect no matter which state they are in. • Exception: department-issued firearms to law enforcement officers. • Firearm prohibition references: 18 U.S.C. § 922(g) & 925(a) • Office for Victims of Crime, U.S. Dept. of Justice, “No Guns for Batterers.” URL http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/infores/dv/noguns.htm. • Battered Women’s Legal Advocacy Project, Inc., “Federal Law Firearms & Ammunition Prohibitions.” URL http://www.angelfire.com/mn/WRAPCo/BWLAP1.html.

13. Some F & DV Statistics 7 • Homicide - 88% of victims of DV fatalities had a documented history of physical abuse. In 1994, 38% of domestic homicides were multiple-victim, usually combining a spouse homicide and suicide, or child homicide. • Homelessness - 46% of cities surveyed by the U.S. Conference of Mayors identified DV as a primary cause of homelessness.

14. Signs of a Batterer 1 • 3 or more = strong potential for physical violence. The more signs, the more likely it is that he is a batterer. The last four signs are particularly characteristic of men who batter their partners. Sometimes only a couple of signs are present, but these generally are very exaggerated (e.g. extreme jealousy over ridiculous things).

15. Signs of a Batterer 2 • Jealousy • Controlling Behavior • Quick Involvement • Unrealistic Expectations • Isolation • Blames Others For His Problems • Blames Others For His Feelings • Hypersensitivity • Cruelty To Animals Or Children • “Playful” Use Of Force In Sex • Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde • See next slide for last four signs of a batterer>>>>

16. Signs of a Batterer, cont.3 • * Past Battering • * Threats of Violence • * Breaking/Striking Objects • * Any Force During Argument • * NOTE: These four signs are particularly characteristic of men who batter their partners!!

17. The Cycle of Family & Domestic Violence*

19. *Most Common Mistakes Pastors/Chaplains/Churches Make • Offering forgiveness too soon. • Advocating restoration too soon. • Counseling the couple together. • Ignores safety of the victims/survivors • Avoids confronting the abuser • Avoids holding the abuser accountable • Accepts abuser’s “repentance” without continuing to hold accountable/break cycle

20. Other DV Mistakes Clergy Make • Assume that a battered woman can just pick up and leave the batterer if she really wanted out • Assume that the primary problem is poor communication between partners • Operate out of a deficit theology that offers “cheap grace” and short-circuits the process of repentance & accountability • Advocate “forgive & forget” • Fail to involve the community in holding the abuser accountable & providing safety for victims

21. Confidentiality • State laws provide limits to confidentiality. • Confidentiality does not include secrets that involve others being hurt. • Beyond the legal responsibility is the moral obligation to protect the oppressed. Failure to hold abusers accountable (do not take the abuser’s word for it !!) makes you legally and morally liable for any further injuries.

22. Pastoral Responses to DV 1 • The first response must be that the violence must stop. This is non-negotiable!

23. *Pastoral Responses, cont. 2 • “SARG” • Safety • Accountability • Restoration • Grieving

24. Pastoral Responses, cont. 3 • “SARG” • Safety of the battered intimate & children • Accountability - call the abuser to account and hold accountable • Restoration may be possible if safety & accountability are in place • Grieving- help mourn the loss and move on with life if reconciliation is not possible

25. Pastoral Responses, cont. 4 • Recognition of abuse • Use of pastoral initiative (victim & abuser) • Sermons • Pastoral prayers • Seminars (be prepared!) • Build necessary network to provide care

26. F & DV Resources • Network of Other Professionals • Web sites • “The Great Santini” (video/movie; military family) • October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month • Center for the Prevention of Sexual & Domestic Violence (CPSDV) • Video: “Broken Vows” • Catalog & Brochure

27. The End