Yo Momma Vocabulary Builder

1. Yo Momma Vocabulary Builder More Jokes and Vocab – yay!

2. ANTEDILUVIAN • Yo momma’s so antediluvian, she knew Cap’n Crunch while he was still a private. • An-te-di-lu-vi-an (an tih duh LOO vee uhn): adj. from the time before the Biblical flood; old, outdated • Antediluvian comes from two Latin words that mean “before” and “flood.” Not just any flood – the 40 days and 40 nights flood in the Bible. So from this etymology, its current more general meaning of simply being old makes sense. We could say that Morten Andersen, nearly 50 and still kicking field goals in the NFL, is an antediluvian player. Jack Nicholson is something of an antediluvian actor, at least in creepily persistent get-the-girl roles. It can also be used as a noun – that is, we could say simply, “yo momma’s an antediluvian.”

3. TIMOROUS • Yo momma’s so timorous, she called 911 during Scary Movie. • Tim-or-ous (TIM uhr uhs): adj. unconfident, fearful; showing a lack of confidence or displaying fearfulness • If you’re timorous, you’re scared. It doesn’t necessarily apply only in instances like yo momma’s, whose timorousness in the above example might border on paranoia. It can be used also to indicate a lack of social confidence. Asking someone out on a date might be a situation infused with a lot of timorous half-remarks and pointless questions. (Pay close attention to the usage in the preceding sentence. Timorous doesn’t have to describe a person: gestures or expressions that indicate a fearful disposition can also be called timorous.) If you’re playing cards and make a timorous bet – with shaky hands and a tiny squeak of a voice – the other players will peg you as a timorous player.

4. HYPERBOLE • Yo momma’s so prone to hyperbole, we hired her to write these jokes! • Hy-per-bo-le (high PUR buh lee): n. a figure of speech in which exaggeration is used for emphasis or effect • Hyperbole is exaggeration. Obvious and intentional exaggeration. All yo momma jokes are hyperbolic. Yo momma did not literally fall in love and break it. Nor is her belt size literally “equator.” If it were, she would be a celestial body with her own orbiting moons, which would have a disastrous effect on the world’s tides and rotation, so we’d know about it by now. These insults use hyperbole for comedic effect. The prefix “hyper-” comes from the Greek, meaning “over” or “beyond.” Think hyperactive, hyper-spaz, hyperdrive.

5. SENESCENT • Yo momma’s so senescent, somebody told her to act her age, and she died. • Se-nes-cent (si NES uhnt): adj. growing old; aging • Things that are senescent are getting old. Many a Menudo member’s career was ended by inevitable senescence. A rusty car on cinder blocks in somebody’s front yard is senescent. Unsold fries at McDonald’s that must be tossed are senescent. If you tell a joke a third time, looking for an extra laugh, your humor is senescent. When it’s almost morning, the night is senescent. It’s important to note from the preceding examples that not only people can be described as senescent. If we wrote any more, this example would enter the realm of senescence.

6. OBLIVIOUS • Yo momma’s so oblivious, she thought “bling-bling” was a panda. • Ob-liv-i-ous (uhb LIV ee uhs): adj. totally unaware of what’s happening • Teenagers always think their parents are oblivious to everything, and then, years later, realize that maybe they had it backward. A man can be oblivious to the feelings a woman (hey, or a man!) might have for him, not noticing little acts of flirtation. Until recently, America was largely oblivious to growing resentment in the Middle East.

7. SUCCULENT • Yo momma is so succulent, she creates her own au jus when she sleeps! • Suc-cu-lent (SUK yoo lent): adj. juicy and tender • Perhaps it’s more dangerous to utter yo momma compliments than insults. One does not like to think of a mother as succulent. Succulent means “juicy,” though we have yet to see a pair of low-riding sweat pants with the word succulent across the butt. Give it time. More generally, succulent can mean delectable, rich in desirable qualities. Meats are often described as succulent, which is another reason that you want to be careful to whose momma you attribute succulence.

8. MELLIFLUOUS • Yo momma’s voice is so mellifluous, she opens her mouth and wars stop! • Mel-lif-lu-ous (muh LIF loo uhs): dj. Pleasing to the ear, flowing with sweetness • Mellifluous sounds like what it means: there is a certain amount of onomatopoeia to it. Mellifluous is pleasing to say and hear. The word flows sweetly off the tongue, much like the mellifluous tones of The Mormon Tabernacle Choir. In Lord of the Rings, Elven singing is magically mellifluous. Rosanne Barr’s rendition of the Star Spangled Banner was not mellifluous, but rather shrill or strident.

9. ERUDITE • I schooled yo momma so much, she’s erudite! • Er-u-dite (AIR yoo dight): adj. having or showing profound knowledge • If you’re erudite, you are highly educated. Your house is wallpapered with graduate degrees. Professors are erudite, and might while away their time writing erudite criticisms of erudite commentaries about erudite books (that nobody ever reads). A yo momma combatant’s street smarts represent a different sort of erudition. The word erudite sounds a little pretentious, so it can impart a little bit of snobbishness to the intelligence it describes.

10. LEVIATHAN • Yo momma’s so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway. She’s the leviathan of mommas! • Le-vi-a-than (luh VYE uh thun): n. something unusually large; the largest or most massive thing of its kind • The world leviathan comes from the Bible. It was the name for a massive sea monster, hence a common use of the word to mean a ship or whale. Leviathan came to mean anything huge, or, more specifically and uniquely, “the biggest of its kind,” as in “Andrea the Giant was the leviathan of professional wrestlers”; “Divo was the leviathan of one-hit wonders”; or “that Great Dane created the leviathan of canine bowel movements.” A synonym is behemoth, also a biblical term that described a large sea creature (maybe a hippo). Clearly, in biblical times, people were more preoccupied with large sea creatures than we are today.

11. CALLOUS • Yo momma’s feet are so callous, when she walks on a wooden floor, it sounds like she’s tap dancing. • Cal-lous (CAL luhs): adj. having or exhibiting a lack of care; covered with calluses • If something is callous, it’s hardened. It can mean literally having calluses (hardened parts of the skin), as in the above example (and, yes, the spellings are different), and can also mean “emotionally hardened or toughened, unfeeling.” While you can have a callous sole, you can also have a callous soul. When Eric and Lyle Menedez, the Beverly Hills convicted murderers, bought Rolex watches between their parents’ murders and their funeral, this was a callous gesture.