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Take a packet from the side shelf. Read each of the examples of yesterday’s writing assignment. (All have some good elements 2 have large problems.) Divide them into 2 categories: Mr. Sorochak’s examples of what to do, and Mr. Sorochak’s examples of paragraph which need revision.
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Take a packet from the side shelf. Read each of the examples of yesterday’s writing assignment. (All have some good elements 2 have large problems.) Divide them into 2 categories: Mr. Sorochak’s examples of what to do, and Mr. Sorochak’s examples of paragraph which need revision. Find at least 2 specific elements/sentences of “to do’s” . Find at least 2 specific elements which need revision. Writing Exercise
Example 1 Thesis: Due to the disobeyance of the rules stated in “Deep Survival” the man from “To Build a Fire” becomes predictable. One very important rule to surviving is to stay calm and levelheaded. When you become stressed and freak out you make stupid unrational decisions. In To Build a Fire the man does a great job of staying calm. In the story it says “the strange and weirdness of it all made no impression on the man.” This shows he stays calm and blocks out the cold and keeps going. Staying calm is one of the most important rules and the man does it very well throughout the story.
Example 2 Thesis: The ending of “To Build a Fire” was predictable because, there are many rules from, “Deep Survival” that he doesn’t follow. The ending of “To Build a Fire was predictable because there are many rules from “Deep Survival that the man didn’t follow. During “To Build a Fire” in stead of giving up he keeps persevering to build a fire. He doesn’t freak out or let fear over rule him. Two important rules from the story “from Deep Survival.”
Example 3 Thesis: Due to the disobeyance of the rules stated in “Deep Survival” the man from “To Build a Fire” becomes predictable. Believing you will succeed is one that the man did for a while but then he stopped believing. “A good idea, he thought, to sleep off death.” (94) At this point the man just gave up. He stopped believing that he’ll make it tot the camp where the boys are at. If he didn’t go to sleep he may have done more in trying to survive.
Example 4 After looking into “Deep Survival” we determined that his death wasn’t predictable. “But it didn’t matter much, after all. What were frosted cheeks? A bit painful that was all; they were never serious.” The man had forgotten about his frosted cheeks by thinking if wasn’t a big deal. He “put away the pain” as stated in “Deep Survival”. As a survivor, you need to manage the pain well. He wasn’t predictable because he thought he could survive, he came across as strong.