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Private Victory

Private Victory. Before you’ll ever win in the public arenas of life, you must first win private battles within yourself. All change begins with you. Private victory helps you become independent. Public Victory.

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Private Victory

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  1. Private Victory • Before you’ll ever win in the public arenas of life, you must first win private battles within yourself. • All change begins with you. • Private victory helps you become independent.

  2. Public Victory • Life’s most urgent question is:What are you doing for others? Martin Luther King Jr. • Public victory helps you become interdependent. It helps you learn to work cooperatively with others.

  3. At the deathbed What do you wish you had spent more time doing? • In the office? • Making more money? • Or you want to spent more time with the people you love?

  4. Rate your relationship

  5. RBA similar to a bank account • You can make deposits • You can take withdrawals • It can be a healthy account or an unhealthy account

  6. RBA different from a bank account • You have opened an RBA with everyone you meet • Once you open an RBA with a person, you can never close it • The deposit of your RBA tends to evaporate

  7. Activity • Share with your classmate (sitting next to you) the most powerful deposit someone has made into your RBA

  8. Here are some examples • When a friend, teacher, or loved one takes the time to say ‘You look nice’ or ‘Great job’. • My friends made me a banner on my birthday. • When I have made mistakes, they forgive, forget, and help and love.

  9. Some suggestions

  10. Keeping Promises Dad, can I play computer game tonight? I have finished all my work. YES, BUT CAN YOU GO TO BED BY 10:30? Okay, I promise. … BOY, IT IS 10:45 NOW. HOW COME YOU ARE STILL PLAYING? I have to complete the game!

  11. Hint to you If your RBA with your parents is low, try building it by keeping your commitments, because when your parents trust you, everything goes so much better.

  12. Do Small Acts of Kindness One kind word can warm three winter months! Japanese Saying A hello, A kind note, A smile, A compliment, A hug – can make a big difference.

  13. Spread the Love of God

  14. Do Small Acts of Kindness Don’t wait until people are dead to give them flowers!

  15. Be Loyal One of the biggest RBA deposits you can make is to be loyal to other people. Loyal people keep secrets Loyal people avoid gossip Loyal people stand for relationship

  16. Be Loyal People need to feel safe and secure in relationships

  17. Listen Listening to someone can be one of the simple but great deposits into another’s RBA; … because people don’t listen usually. You have knowledge of this, dear brothers. But let every man be quick in hearing, slow in words, slow to get angry. James 1:19

  18. Say You are Sorry A yell, A bang to the door, Overreact, Make stupid mistake – will make a RBA overdrawn But by saying ‘I was wrong’, ‘I apologize’, ‘I am sorry’ – can restore the overdrawn bank account

  19. Why is it so difficult? Pride A lack of courage Defense mechanism

  20. Apologies disarm people

  21. Over Again I know that I have hurt youand wish I could take it back.I wish I could turn back the hoursand do it all over again.But we know that can’t happenthat it just isn’t possible.But I can say that I’m sorryand ask for your forgiveness.

  22. Set Clear Expectations To develop trust we need to avoid sending vague messages or implying something that is not true or not likely to happen

  23. Reflection Think of a relationship that is damaged; propose the way to rebuild it.

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