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WWI Essay Reflection. Common Errors--Introductions. Historical Context What does the reader really need to know in order to understand my essay? Decent Context: How WWI began Who fought in WWI Better Context: Dates of war Alliance system led to war on a wider scale Excellent Context:
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Common Errors--Introductions Historical Context What does the reader really need to know in order to understand my essay? Decent Context: • How WWI began • Who fought in WWI Better Context: • Dates of war • Alliance system led to war on a wider scale Excellent Context: • Industrial Revolution • Militarism • Nationalism was fierce • Brief statement of what wars were like before WWI
Common Errors--Introduction Historical Context not connected to Thesis Mediocre: “World War One began because of the alliance system. Once one country went to war, its allies had to follow. WWI was different from past wars because women worked, and trench warfare led to the use of new weapons.” Excellent: “World War One was caused in part by militarism. Since European nations were focused on war and stockpiling weapons in the late 1800s, new technologies were developed. This changed the nature of war very quickly. WWI was different from past wars because women worked, and trench warfare led to the use of new weapons.”
Common Errors—Body Paragraphs • Not enough cause and effect analysis • No concluding sentences
Examples of Cause and Effect Analysis • “The invention of the machine gun led to the use of trenches as a defensive tactic.” • “Due to trench warfare, many new weapons such as poison gas and tanks were developed to gain an offensive edge in an otherwise stagnant war.” • “Governments encouraged their citizens to ration food because food imports were destroyed in submarine blockades and most of the nations’ farmers were young men who had been drafted into war.”
Cause and Effect Analysis:Topic Sentences Decent Topic Sentence: The experience of the soldier in WWI was different than in past wars. Excellent Topic Sentences: • Because of growing militarism in European countries, new technologies were invented, including the submarine, which completely changed how wars were fought. • Trench warfare was developed in WWI and drastically changed how soldiers would live in war.
Common Errors--Conclusions • Long Term impacts too vague Decent Example: “WWI was different from past wars because…WWI was one of the most important wars in history. Our world has never been the same since.” Excellent Example: “WWI was different from past wars because…WWI changed the ways wars are fought and has led to modern warfare with the use of bombs, submarines and tanks. With respect to the impact of war on the average citizen, after WWI women in many countries gained the right to vote. In addition, the populations of many European countries decreased. WWI has truly shaped the modern world.
Critical Reading • 2 Highlighters (yellow & orange) • Intro • Yellow—historical context • Orange—any words or phrases that help connect the historical context to the thesis and essay question • Body Paragraphs • Yellow—concluding sentences • Orange—any cause and effect analysis • Conclusion • Yellow—Sentences that effectively establish the significance of the developments of WWI
Reflection (to hand in…) • What have you improved on since you first started learning about thesis statements, topic sentences and essay writing. • What would you like to improve on with your semester exam essay? • Did you prepare enough for this exam by writing out your thesis and topic sentences at home and finding specific evidence to use or do you wish you had prepared more?