Spiritual Direction & Skype

1. Spiritual Direction & Skype Tara M. Owens, CSD • Anam Cara Ministries

2. Where We’re Going • Recognizing Where We Are • Recognizing Where Our Directees Are • What Technology Represents (Recognizing Freedoms and Unfreedoms) • The Mechanics of Skype Spiritual Direction • Skype Mechanics • Visual & Environmental Factors • Spiritual Realities of Distance Direction Via Skype • Billing & Consent Forms • Q&A

3. A moment of prayer…

4. Where Are You? Desolation Technology helps me connect with others I am comfortable with smart phones, tablets, and other devices I recognize that I have lots to learn, but that’s okay My relationship with technology is mixed—I use it, but I don’t like it I feel like technology subverts the work of God I often feel stupid or ashamed when trying something new with technology Consolation

5. We need to reframe the discussion of technology and spirituality in terms of 'gift' rather than commodity—because that is the language of the Kingdom of God. Technology can be both gift and tool. We cannot allow the world to exclusively determine the language and modes in which we interact with technology. We must retake this space—even if we choose to reject this space—for the Kingdom by choosing to see both the gift and the Giver in it.

6. What makes us most human… is what is least computable about us—the connections between our mind and our body, the experiences that shape our memory and our thinking, our capacity for emotion and empathy. The great danger we face as we become more intimately involved with our computers—as we come to experience more of our lives through the disembodied symbols flickering across our screens—is that we’ll begin to lose our humanness, to sacrifice the very qualities that separate us from machines. The only way to avoid that fate… is to have the self-awareness and courage to refuse to delegate to computers the most human of our mental activities and intellectual pursuits, particularly “tasks that demand wisdom.” The Shallows: What The Internet Is Doing To Our Brains, by Nicholas Carr, p 208

7. Where Are Our Directees? • Highly connected—and only getting more so • Most have Facebook profiles • Most have smart phones & other mobile devices • Even missionaries in remote locations have access to and use Skype • They have spent money on apps, on devices • Often their children have smart phones, and they are trying to “keep up” • Fastest growing Facebook demographic: Women over 50

8. They also feel… Surrounded Unable to shut it off Unsure of how to interact with God in this space Overwhelmed Wanting peace, but not sure how to find it

9. Technology Represents… • Community • Family • Connection • Friendship • Information • Resources • Education • Guidance • Distraction • Frustration • Temptation (idolatry, infidelity, pornography) • Addiction • Workaholism • Demands • Violation/Invasion

10. We need to discern… • Where am I free when it comes to technology? • What is my role in this space? • Am I called into this field of interaction? • Where are my areas of unfreedom? • Where do I find it difficult to love?

11. Mechanics of Secure Free or Pro (group calls) Quality based on internet speed www.skype.com

12. Skype mechanics • Download Skype from www.skype.com • Create username and password • Test your device’s camera & sound • Add contacts by searching • Create your profile • Put directees on a separate list • Be aware of your “status” (upper left corner)

13. Keep background clean & uncluttered

14. Better, but not best

15. Visual & Environmental Factors • Uncluttered background is important • Light should be shining on your face, not behind you • Be aware of the “confrontational” nature of Skype calls • Have a protocol for your directee BEFORE you ever start a call (see “Spiritual Direction at a Distance” doc) • Ensure all of your programs are closed, and enter full screen mode • Be aware of the awkwardness of technology & silence

16. Spiritual Realities of Distance Direction • The computer is used for A LOT of different things • Prayer & communication are paramount • Ask your directee to take control of their environment • Increased vulnerability because of a feeling of “aloneness” • Watch the tendency to “objectify” the directee, because they are “pixels” on the screen • Be aware of how easily you can become distracted • Check in regularly with your directee about how it’s going

17. More to think about… • Spend time talking about the challenges of direction at a distance • Make contingencies for disconnection, so that your directee feels secure and taken care of (like a glass of water in the direction room) • Focus on embodied centering exercises: it’s easy to disconnect from your body and essential humanness • Ask questions that relate to physicality, not just emotions or thoughts

18. Billing & Consent Forms • Consent Forms are particularly important at a distance • It is especially easy for directees at a distance to cancel direction appointments at the last moment—articulate your cancelation policy clearly • Because directees are virtually connected people, make sure you have a social media policy • Walk through recommendations for spiritual direction at a distance (space for direction is particularly important) • Communicate what your billing policies are, and be clear on when payment is to be received (PayPal, checks, etc.)

19. Q & A

20. Tara M. Owenstara@anamcara.com719-233-5568www.anamcara.com@AnamCaraTOwww.facebook.com/AnamCaraMinistries