Body Language and Psychology

1. Body Language and Psychology Learning how to read people.

2. Body Language The most important six aspects of bodily action: • Movement • Eye contact- is one of the most important aspect of bodily communication. • Facial expression- is one of the most important aspect of bodily communication. • Posture- is the position in which body is being held. • Gestures- a movements that are made with hands, head or face to show a particular meaning. • Proxemics- is the study of how to use space in communication.

3. Body Movements • Major types of movement: • Emblems • Illustrators • Affect displays • Regulators • Adaptors

4. Emblems • Emblems are body gestures that directly translate into words or phrases. • Emblems are used consciously and purposely to communicate the same meaning as the words. • Emblems are culture specific.

5. Illustrators • Illustrators enhance the verbal messages they accompany. • Expressions are often illustrated with hands, head and general body movements. • Illustrators, 20% increase an ability to remember.

6. Affect Displays • Affect displays are movements of the face, but also the hands and general body that communicate emotional meaning. • Affect displays are often unconscious.

7. Regulators • Regulators are behaviors that monitor, control, coordinate, or maintain the speaking of another individual.

8. Adaptors • Adaptors are gestures that satisfy some personal needs. • Adaptors are divided into: • Self adaptors (self touching movements) • Alter – adaptors (movements directed at a recipient) • Object – adaptors (gestures focused on objects)

9. Influencing with Body Language To influence you need to have a relationship and all relationships fall into two categories. • Positive (interest) • Negative (noninterest)

10. What unconscious action happens when someone views something they like? How can this be used? -Pupils dilate Advertising Lying and/or deception Detecting interest from a possible mate/date

11. List some non-verbal cues for the following: Someone interested Someone not interested Arms fold across chest Rigid stance Continuing to square up to you Glancing past you Fidgeting • exposure of elbow crease • long eye contact • Angled stance • Relaxed posture • Touching of the hand, leg, shoulder or face

12. Disbelief • Puzzlement • Protecting ourselves • Seeking intimacy • impatience Translate these non-verbal cues: -Lifting an eyebrow -rubbing your nose -clasping your arms -wink one eye -tap finger

13. Territorial needs • Everyone has a defined body area, a territory, and a personal space, which is called a body buffer zone

14. SummarizeIntimate distance: -Acceptable for family, friends, lovers, and parent/child (touching 18 inches/ 0-6 inches in Latin Cultures) -If confined w/strangers body must remain rigid to indicate apology for touching -Glances are ok but long gazes are seen as completely inappropriate

15. Close (18-30 inches) -ex. wives and husbands, when others move in it portrays interested , can hold hands Far (30-48 inches) called “limit of physical domination, acceptable for meeting someone on the street Personal Distance

16. Social Distance • Close (4-7 feet) transact interpersonal business, house wife/repairman, meeting someone new, boss greeting an employee • Far (7-12 feet) Formal social or business relationships, Big boss and employee. This distance means steady eye contact during conversation, failure to do so is disrespectful. Can allow you to keep working w/out seeming rude.

17. Public Distance • Close (12-25 feet) teacher addressing student • Far (25 or more) Politicians (for safety)

18. In order to develop a relationship, of any kind, what must first happen? • Both must unmask and show their true selves, for if not they can not become close

19. T/F Smiling is the most common mask we wear, and it is one that is over used. • True. Most masking techniques are taught through culture and are considered “manners” or “etiquette”

20. When do we drop our masks? • When we are intimately comfortable w/ the person or when we see them as a non-person (it) *Extreme ends of the spectrum/usually worn to protect someone's feelings or our own

21. Besides your clothes, what is the 1st thing people notice about you? How can this help you obtain a date? Guys Girls Stance Uninterested or Defensive Arms crossed Tight Face Rigid Posture Interested Expose neck, elbow crease, open stance Stance or Walk • Provides messages as to your intentions Hips forward w/ legs spread Thumbs locked on belt with fingers pointed inward Counter these by offering up complimentary & opposing body language. If trying to show interest hold your gaze or glance longer than appropriate (just a little/ don’t be a creepy) .

22. What things can be done after gaining someone’s attention to progress to a more intimate encounter? After flirting as commenced: • Invade body space minimally enough for obvious objection. Stay till they become comfortable • Let eyes linger in areas where short glances would be necessary • Stare into her/him while drawing attention to places like mouth, neck, chest, groin. Attention must be narrowed to that one person, not spread around to others

23. What are some ways you can tell if he/she is available? • Look for a ring or pale skin on the ring finger • Stance while sitting • Knees apart/ holding gaze/ loose posture • Gestures • Draws attention to mouth, neck, thighs, chest, hips, butt • Walk • Hips forward or loose/ sway or swagger of hips/ shoulders back 7 head up

24. What happens to both men & women upon meeting someone they are interested in breeding with? -Step 1 Posture Changes Muscles Tense Body sagging disappears Posture becomes erect Stomach tightens Face Blushes or glows Preening begins Adjusting of clothes/ hair/ makeup

25. Step two- Positioning • Couples will sit together • Face each other • Lean into one another • Use arms to make a circle • Cross their legs towards each other What happens to both men & women upon meeting someone they are interested in breeding with?

26. What are some things a less aggressive woman might do to convey interest to a man? • Flirting glances • Holding his eye • Turning her head to one side (expose neck) • Rolling her lips • Revealing the top of her thigh by crossing her legs • Putting her hand on her hip • Exposing her wrist or palm

27. What can posture be used to transmit? • Question • Statement • Interest • Non- Interest • Protection • Inclusion • Exclusion

28. What are the “rules of thumb” for looking at a person in the following situations: (careful cultural) Passing someone on the street: • Must look away when within 8 feet Putting a person down: • Stare and continue People with unusual hair, clothes, facial hair, hair or piercings: • Stare then look away Make sure to follow these rules as not to be socially awkward!!!

29. NLP Eye Chart (caution)

30. True/False When studying kinesics, one must take all of the following into account: • 1. Situation • 2. All body movements at the time • 3. Any physiological patterns • True- No single motion stands alone, there is always a pattern