Understanding Emotional Intelligence in Interpersonal Communication

1. Semester 1 Module: Interpersonal Communication Emotional Intelligence Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

2. Learning Objectives • To understand the term Emotional Intelligence • To know the difference between EQ and IQ • To gain a brief introduction to the development of EQ • To be introduced to the Interpersonal competencies - BarOn EQi model • To explore your own EQ (using two models) • To understand how EQ is central to people’s success as sportspeople, sports coaches, or those wishing to develop a sporting related business Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

3. What is Emotional Intelligence • “An array of capabilities, competencies and skills that influence one’s ability to succeed in coping with environmental demands and pressures” Reuven Bar On • It is a factor in determining one’s ability to succeed in life • Relates to potential for performance • Is central to those competing in professional sports or those working with professional sportspeople Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

4. Sporting Personalities In the following slide: How would you rate some of the following people’s capacity to cope with environmental demands and pressures... (demands and pressures from competition, clubs, players, supporters, media, sponsors, managers, life as a celebrity...etc...) What are the factors that seem to enable some to cope better than others? Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

5. New Players : Roy Keane Denis Irwin Ireland Qualify for the 1994 World Cup in the U.S.A

6. Questions for you to reflect on? • Are you aware of your own feelings? Can you name them at a given time and can you express them without losing control? • How do you react when you are disappointed, sad or angry? • Can you remain calm under pressure as a person, player, sportsperson or potential coach? • Are you aware of the feelings of others at a given time? Do you adjust your communication style to accommodate the feelings of others (empathy)? If in a coaching session –will you remain observant to the non-verbal domain of those you are coaching? • How do you respond to conflict in your life? Can you solve problems and maintain relationships with those who contribute to the conflict? • Can you separate people/personalities from issues? • Are you confident and optimistic about your own potential as a human being and do you bring humour and optimism to a situation? Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

7. A Brief History of EQ • 1936 (Robert Thorndyke)-”social Intelligence” • 1940 (David Wechsler)-”non intellective intelligence” • 1980 (Reuven Bar-On)-the concept of EQ • 1983 (Howard Gardner)-”personal intelligence” • 1989 (John Mayer & Peter Salovey)-”Emotional Intelligence” • 1995 (Daniel Goleman)- popularized Emotional Intelligence Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

8. Still a new and contested theory... • Since the publication of Daniel Goleman’s book (Emotional Intelligence 1995), there is increasing interest in the theory that IQ (intelligence quotient) is not an adequate predictor of success and that a range of personal & interpersonal abilities EQ may be crucial to understanding success. • Therefore Psychology as a discipline – is now becoming interested in studying the non-cognitive domain of intelligence e.g. 1985 Somerville Longtitudinal Study of 450 boys (40 years) in Massachusetts 75% of them from welfare families). Findings: EQ was more important than IQ in accounting for those who were successful i.e managing frustration, emotions and interpersonal skills. 1996-Feist & Barron Longtitudinal Study of 80 Doctoral graduates from Berkeley in 1950s –studied again in their 70s and the findings were: their social and emotional abilities were four times more important than IQ in determining their professional success EQ now being used within many recruitment processes Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

9. Components of EQ Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

10. Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

11. Interpersonal Relationship • Empathy • Social Responsibility • Assertiveness • Independence • Self-Regard • Self-Actualization • Emotional Self- Awareness Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

12. The two other domains of EQ Managing Stress The capacity to experience stressors in life and to be able to manage them using a variety of strategies (e.g. physical, cognitive, emotional, social & spiritual) Understanding one’s limitations and being able to access the resources we need Adaptability The capacity to cope with change and to be able to respond to the needs of a changing environment. Adaptability is sometimes seen as a trait – we are born with but is also seen as an attribute we can develop by being exposed to diverse situations and by responding positively to new challenges Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

13. Components of EQ: Intrapersonal. • Awareness of your own emotions – ability to name feelings you are experiencing • Ability to manage your emotions – anger, anxiety, sadness expressed in a constructive manner and ability to create and maintain positive emotions • Recognising emotions in other people – putting yourself in the other persons shoes and having empathy for other peoples feelings Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

14. Components of EQ: Intrapersonal. • Expressing emotions- verbal, visual and vocal communication • Managing relationships- creating positive interactions with others and managing conflict • Motivating self and others- ability to set goals, knowing what you love to do and striving to be the best you can be, delay gratification Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

15. Components of EQ: Intrapersonal. • Ability to express feelings – accept/express anger, warmth etc • Express beliefs or thoughts openly, voice opinions, take a stand, etc. • Stand up for personal rights without being aggressive or abusive (being assertive – aware of your needs and the needs of others) Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

16. Components of EQ – Interpersonal, Social Responsibility • Ability to demonstrate oneself as a cooperative, contributing and constructive member of one’s social group • Acting responsibly, having social consciousness & concern for others • Ability to do things for and with others, accepting others, upholding rules Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

17. Interpersonal: Empathy • Ability to be aware of, understand, and appreciate other peoples feelings • Being able to emotionally read other people and pick up on social cues • Ability to care and show concern for others Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

18. Components of EQ: Interpersonal: Relationships • Ability to establish and maintain mutually satisfying relationships • Intimacy, giving and receiving affection • Feel at ease in social relations Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

19. Emotions at Work! Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

20. Role of Emotions- Mad, Sad, Glad • Describe an experience of strong emotion at work • In groups brainstorm all the ways emotions affect the performance of people in positive and negative ways Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

21. Emotions - Basic necessities of life • Biological survival-fight/flight • Affiliation- We are one • Social Boundaries-navigating social waters • Intuition-feeling your way • Communication-body, voice and words Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

22. Emotional Hijacks Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

23. Emotional Hijack • Most events which we respond to in life involve a journey from sensation to action (responding to a given stimuli).These responses are typically routed in our brain through the Thalamus (like an air traffic controller), which redirects them to the Visual cortex (thinking brain) for logical processing. The cortex thinks about the impulse and makes sense of it. The cortex then sends a message to the Amygdala, where peptides & hormones are released to create emotion and action. • Sometimes however the thalamus quickly reacts to a perceived threat and bypasses the cortex. The signal goes directly to the amygdala (which can only respond based on previously stored patterns). The response can be positive e.g. we run if we perceive danger but typically the response is negative, i.e we say something or do something that is irrational and we lose control over the emotion. For a few seconds – our brain is flooded with electro chemicals –and our perception is distorted. Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

24. Emotional Hi Jack? What happens the referee’s notebook? Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

25. Emotional Hijack & Developing Positive Responses • Self awareness of what our body is telling us... stress/fears/anxiety-awareness of our emotional state • Biding Time ...counting to ten – not responding in an irrational way...saying ...I need time to think about this ...can we return to this when we are both calm • Active Listening, Empathy and Conflict Resolution Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

26. EQ-I Measures • Intrapersonal: emotional self awareness, assertiveness, self-actualisation, self regard, independence • Interpersonal: empathy, social responsibility, interpersonal relationships • Adaptability: problem solving, reality testing, flexibility • Stress Management: stress tolerance, impulse control • General Mood: happiness and mood Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

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28. EQ and IQ Understanding the Differences Between Them Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

29. What Emotional Intelligence Is not • Cognitive Intelligence (IQ) • A standard means of measuring our cognitive abilities e.g. memory, reasoning, thinking, visual-motor performance Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

30. EQ & IQ • Intellect (cognitive & Thinking) Located in the Cerebral Cortex • Emotions are controlled by the ancient sub cortex • Emotional intelligence involves the emotional centres working in harmony with the intellectual centres Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

31. How does EQ differ from IQ • EQ focuses on developing an understanding of and ability to mange emotions • EQ can be developed and enhanced through life • Until recent years EQ has been over looked in predicting a person’s potential for success • IQ focuses upon developing cognitive abilities and is more academically orientated • IQ is thought to be established at birth and cannot be enhanced • IQ has traditionally been used to predict a person’s potential for success Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

32. Emotional Capital - 3 core elements in Business • External emotional capital - value of feelings and perceptions held by the customer and external stakeholders • Internal emotional capital - values, feelings, beliefs held by all working in the business • Intra-personal emotional capital–level of positive energy a leader invests and how they mobilise, focus and renew the collective energy of the people they lead Source: Emotional Capitalists Martyn Newman 2005 Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

33. (IQ+TQ) EQ = Human Potential IQ – Cognitive ability TQ – Technical e.g. Training EQ – are the set of factors which multiply the IQ+TQ Theory of Performance Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

34. Hard Case for Soft Skills Group Discussion • The importance of Emotional Intelligence for success in the business world! Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

35. The Emotionally Intelligent Manager • Is self aware, motivated and perceives others accurately • Manages emotions to create well formed outcomes • Can recognise and name emotions • Prepares to manage both people and tasks • Thinks positively and stays with a challenge • Is flexible and adapts easily to changes • Excellent social skills and sense of community • Is resilient and looks for solutions • Seeks to grow and develop Adapted from Emotional Intelligence Chartered Management Institute 2003 Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

36. EQ – Women Vs Men Bar-On study of 7,700 men and women • No difference on total EQ • Women higher on 3 Interpersonal abilities (empathy, social responsibility & interpersonal relationships) • Men higher on intrapersonal abilities (self actualisation, assertiveness), stress management and adaptability Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

37. Your personal EQ? Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

38. EQ –Self Test Inventory- 5 Domains(from Using EI at work –Fenman Ltd 2000) Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

39. EQ Test • What have you learnt? • What do you need to stop doing? • What do you need to start doing? • What do you need to continue doing? Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

40. Skill Development & Skill Improvement • Skill development = to developing a new skill • Skill improvement = improving a skill we already practice • When we master a skill it becomes a habit • Thus, skill development and skill improvement are both fundamentally about “habit formation” or “changing existing habits” respectively. Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

41. Skill Development Stages of Skill Development (personal or interpersonal skill): 1. Awareness that the skill is needed 2. Understanding of what the skill is and behaviours required 3. Practising the skill while receiving feedback and encouragement 4. Continuing to practice until the new skill becomes habitual Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

42. Skill Development - Stages • Skill performance initially awkward or mechanical. • With consistent practice skill performance becomes more natural and habitualized. • Eventually become automatic in performing skill and in some cases (as experts) can’t really describe how we do it. • Overall, we begin as a “novice” and gradually move towards becoming more of an “expert” Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

43. Skill Improvement • Many of our skills are unconscious so skill improvement can be challenging for us • Skill improvement implies we can already perform a particular skill but there is room for improvement. • Examples: • Driving (perhaps we still tend to drive over the speed limit, or have driving habits that need improving) • Working on certain bad habits or weaknesses we may have. Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

44. practice 3. Unconscious Competence Conscious Competence Conscious Incompetence Unconscious Incompetence refinement 2. awareness 1. Reflection Model of Improvement Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential

45. Reading for this topic • www.eiconsortium.org Papers on – The Business Case for Emotional Intelligence, Emotional Intelligence: What is it and why it matters • Stein & Howard. (2006)The EQ Edge, emotional intelligence and your success John Wiley and Sons • Goleman, D (2006) Emotional Intelligence, Bantam Books • http://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/lsu/ Centre for Education and Developing Human Potential