Conflict Management Strategies for your Toolkit

1. Conflict Management Strategies for your Toolkit Dr. Buddy Coleman UNC Wilmington

2. Strategies for Your Toolkit • Strategy 1: Avoid Emotional High Jacking • Strategy 2: Prevent Conflict • Strategy 3: Resolve Conflict Sequential Process Strategy 1 Strategy 2 Strategy 3

3. Strategy 1 – Most Important OneAvoid becoming emotionally high jacked • Do not emotionally high jack ourselves • Do not allow others to high jack us http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGBTkREbXfY

4. Avoid High Jacking Ourselves • Psychodynamic Leadership Theory • Hardwired neurological pathways; aggression and emotional states are driven by the medulla oblongata in our brains • Behavioral patterns • Personality development • Preferences & Orientations • Comfort Zone: what we like rather than dislike • Needs based: satisfying our needs • Resist modifying our behaviors • Doing what we “want to do” • Instead of what we “should do”

5. Do Not Allow Others to High Jack Us • People who are in control of their emotions are in control • Resist giving in to physiological and psychological comfort zone responses • Do not take the “bait” when people and/or situations set off our emotional triggers • Emotional triggers are usually developed from childhood and are our “hot buttons” that can cause us to lose control and overreact

6. Effective Charter Leaders • Operationally defined as individuals who live, work and perform at their very best • They accomplish this by being keenly aware of their strengths and weaknesses • Most importantly, they modify their thinking, behaviors and decisions to think, analyze, listen and “take the high ground” rather than undermining themselves emotionally

7. Emotional Intelligence • Understanding ourselves personally • Understanding our strengths and weaknesses • Maintaining an effective leadership orientation • We are no longer leaders once we become emotionally high jacked • Effectiveness of our actions and decisions are determined by the reactions

8. Emotional Triggers • Defined as behaviors and situations that may cause us to respond more emotionally than rationally • Usually related to childhood events, parental relationships and/or deep feelings about loved ones • The emotional triggers stimulate the medulla oblongata in our brains and result in a “flight” or “fight” response • Example of an emotional trigger http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZpDnXYIFjo

9. Emotional Triggers • What kind of things do people do that you dislike? • What are your feelings towards people when they do things that you dislike? • What are some of your emotional triggers?

10. Strategy 2: Prevent Conflict • First we must implement Strategy 1 by always taking the high ground and avoiding being emotionally high jacked by ourselves or others • Second, we must establish agreements based on purpose, mission and goals relative to behaviors and interactions for all charter school stakeholders • Principal/Director, Board Members, Teachers, Parents, Students and Staff • Staff development for Principal and Board Members is critical and should include personality inventories to promote understanding among charter school leaders

11. Preventing Conflict • Establish behavioral agreements for discussions, interactions and decision making • These must be in alignment with charter school mission, purpose and goals • Behavioral agreements must also be congruent with the roles of principal, board members, teachers and parents. • Charter school leaders must focus on managing the interpersonal dynamics of all charter school stakeholders

12. Preventing Conflict • Establish and commit to agreements • Written guidelines for interaction • Types of agreements include: • Communication • Behaviors • Assumptions • Trust • Feedback

13. Example of Behavioral Agreements“We agree to… • Open, honest, & regular communication • No silent disagreements • Collaborate with each other…focus on win-win • Anticipate opportunities and issues • Assume positive Intent • Respect each other • Maintain confidentiality • Keep our promises • Provide immediate feedback to anyone who violates an agreement • Support each other to ensure a successful charter school

14. Preventing Conflict • It our responsibility, as charter school leaders, to resolve interpersonal conflicts ASAP in meaningful ways relative to maintaining healthy relationships to work together to stay on point • Leaders must be able to understand and be able to deal with feelings, disagreements and issues • This is our responsibility

15. Preventing Conflict • To be successful, charter school leaders must establish high quality, trusting personal relationships with their teachers, parents and board members • This is accomplished by: • Building relationships based on openness, expertise and a willingness to listen to the views, opinions, and priorities of your stakeholders • Maintaining an even-handed and controlled approach in all interactions. • Guiding stakeholders via personal interactions rather than positional authority and allowing time for them to process issues and decisions.

16. Preventing Conflict • Board Members’ Roles • Preparation: Does the board have a clear sense of how it will conduct oversight of the academic program and fiscal health of the organization? • Board Members’ Abilities • Capacity and Composition: Does the board the have the skills and expertise to govern? • Board Members/Principal Governance • Structure: Is the proposed governance structure in line with best practice? • Clarity: Is there clear delineation of the authority and duties of the board, school leader, parents, teachers, and contractor, such as an education service provider (ESP) or a charter management organization (CMO)?

17. Preventing Conflict • Charter school leader’s ability to maintain a professional, controlled orientation • Effectively use communication and listening skills to promote positive and constructive interactions • Establish formal structures and operationally define roles that are clearly understood

18. Strategy 3: Resolving Conflict • First, Strategies 1 and 2 must be implemented • Next, if conflict occurs…or rather when conflict occurs, then we, as leaders, must take appropriate action to resolve the conflict in meaningful and positive ways • We begin by making sure that we understand conflict

19. Resolving Conflict • Is conflict good? • Is conflict bad? • Neither • How we understand & respond to conflict is the key

20. Resolving Conflict • Avoid blame game • Avoid getting emotional • Do not take it personally • Effective listening, understanding and communication skills • Make it clear you are there to help

21. Resolving Conflict • Operationally defining conflict as a state of unresolved differences: • Within an individual • Between individuals • An individual and a group • Or two or more groups • Based on caring about something • Difficulty getting or giving something • Between two or more people, locked in an interdependent relationship • What one party does affects the other party

22. Simplest Way to Resolve Conflict • Eliminate the relationship • Leave the interdependent relationship • Refuse to interact with the other person(s) • In many situations this is not practical • As charter school leaders, this is not usually possible • Therefore, we must learn how to address and deal with conflict

23. Types & Sources of Organizational Conflicts • Interpersonal • Exists when people interact in ways to try and achieve goals and objectives • They have different attitudes, personalities, values, backgrounds and experiences • Competition for and/or management of resources • Limited resources • Resource decision making • Standardized Operating Procedures (SOPs) • Controls to manage behavior • Resistance to rules • Line-Staff Relationships • Authority issues • Resistance to control • Different Understandings of Goals

24. Five Ways to Deal With Conflict • Denial/Avoid/Withdraw • Positional Power • Accommodation • Compromise • Collaborating

25. Denial/Avoid/WithdrawIssues are not addressed • Use if – The issues or timing is not critical; a cooling off period is required for both parties; and more information is needed is needed to resolve conflict • Do not use if –The situation requires immediate attention or when one party remains frustrated by the avoidance of the issue

26. Positional PowerAuthoritative • Use if – Swift action is needed in resolving the conflict • Do not use if -Concern for the parties involved is not clear and the consequences of the action taken have not been considered

27. AccommodationLow on assertiveness, but high on cooperation • Use if – it will allow for a better position to be heard; the preservation of the relationship is more important than the issue; or, the most important one, you are wrong. • Do not use if – the issue is significant and must be resolved sooner than later

28. CompromiseModerately cooperative and assertive • Use if – The issue or goal is of moderate importance and both parties involved feel a compromise would help in the resolution. • Do not use if – Only one party is willing to give up something. Negotiation is not possible.

29. CollaboratingWin-Win Approach • Use if – There are shared values or goals, time is available and the power among the parties is balanced; also if there is effective communication and the concerns are too important to compromise • Do not use if – There is no balance of power between the parties, the values and goals are not shared, or poor communication exists between the parties

30. Charter School Conflicts • Tension among board members • Power, accountability and control: • Principal & Board • Principal, Board & Sponsoring District • Principal & Teachers • Principal & Parents • Teachers & Parents • Teachers & Students

31. Conflict Situations Discussion • What are some conflict situations in your charter school? • What do you think is causing these conflict situations?

32. Strategies for Your Toolkit • Strategy 1: Avoid Emotional High Jacking • Strategy 2: Prevent Conflict • Strategy 3: Resolve Conflict Sequential Process Strategy 1 Strategy 2 Strategy 3

33. Questions