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The Case of the Missing Pathogens. By Landon Shields, Will Wagner, and Ed Labovitz. February 5, 2007 1900 hours.
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The Case of the Missing Pathogens By Landon Shields, Will Wagner, and Ed Labovitz
February 5, 2007 1900 hours It was I nice cool evening at Monarch University, perfect for a dope party. Dr. Donley was chillaxing with her homefries, and making sweat convo with Dr. Sandra Music, when Dr. Dangerkitty walked in. He gave Dr. Donley a bad look and said, “Your not very nice because you stole my grant money, but don’t worry cause you’ll get yours”. Donley, who wasn’t phased from the threat, answered, “You don’t even know.” and turned her back to Dangerkitty. Dangerkitty who wasn’t even invited to the party ran out crying. Outside of the party Dangerkitty sat down bawling “I can’t believe she said that, that poop coming out of her mouth, Poop Mouth. I’m just gonna go home and pet my dogs.”
February 5, 2007 2000 hours Dr. Powers was walking down the hall fuming with anger against America when he saw Dr. Dangerkitty curled up crying on the floor like a little girl. With a stupid British accent, he mumbled “why are you curled up crying on the floor like a little girl?” Dr. Dangerkitty replied “its that whorible Donley. She is not very nice.” Powers answered “ I was thinking the same thing. Lets get her back.” They began scheming as they pranced down the hall, hand in hand.
February 5, 2007 2100 hours Dr. Powers led Dr. Dangerkitty to his underground cult layer called London. There they began their plot. Dr. Dangerkitty pulled Cyanide out of his pocket that he grabbed from his lab and said “Will this do?” Dr. Powers chuckled like a little British pansy “He he he.” Dr. Dangerkitty headed off to the party to distract Dr. Donley while Dr. Powers goes to poison Donley’s drink.
February 5, 2007 2200 hours Once at the party, Dr. Dangerkitty begins to engage Dr. Donley in conversation chuckling as he talked like a little fairy. “I’m sorry…he he he….for the way I acted….he he he …earlier. Can I get you anything…he he he?” Dr. Donley replied “I would love another orange marmalade and why are you laughing?” Dr. Dangerkitty chuckles and walks off. Meanwhile Dr. Powers has gotten the poison ready and meets Dr. Dangerkitty at the refreshment table and slips in the Cyanide. Dangerkitty returns with the orange flavored Cyanidemalade and Dr. Donley drinks it.
February 5, 2007 2230 hours Dr. Sloopy Stretch is passed out on the floor, drunk.
February 5, 2007 2231 hours In a matter of minutes, Dr. Donley begins to seizure. Everyone at the party gathers around including Dr. Powers and Dr. Dangerkitty. Everyone gasps as Dr. Donley’s flinching body flinches. As Powers stares down at her dying body, she painfully grabs his leg painfully. It was painful. So painful that she broke the skin and his blood dripped down onto her flinching body. Little to everyone else at the party’s knowledge, Dr. Donley had sensed their plot to murder her, but was too late to do anything about it. With her last breath she exclaimed “I think I’m dying.”
February 5, 2007 2300 hours At this time we arrived at the crime scene to find Dr. Donley’s dead body, her smallpox missing, and the crime scene deserted except for Dr. Sloopy Stretch who was still passed out on the floor.
Drawn Conclusions • Dr. Dangerkitty and Dr. Powers worked together to murder Dr. Donley. • Dr. Dangerkitty wanted Dr. Donley dead so he would receive more grant money. • Dr. Powers wanted Dr. Donley dead because he is an international terrorist and wanted the smallpox to distribute to American children. • All the doctors fled the scene because they were scared they would be prime suspects because of their grudges against Dr. Donley. During this time, Dr. Powers stole the smallpox. • Dr. Sloopy Stretch had too much to drink.
DNA Fingerprinting • There are millions of base pairs in each persons DNA. Each persons DNA has a different sequence. Because it would take too long to look at the millions of base pairs in each persons DNA, a shorter method is used that looks at the repeating patterns in DNA. A small number of sequences of DNA are used to determine whether two DNA samples are from the same person.
ELISA test • The ELISA test is a technique used to detect the presence of an antigen or the concentration of antibodies. This test is primarily used to detect HIV or West Nile.
Smallpox • Smallpox is a highly contagious disease with a mortality rate of 3-35%. The virus is found in the blood and within 12-15 days attacks the skin cells, causing scarring to occur.