New Volunteer Orientation

1. New Volunteer Orientation Parent Support Program University of Utah Hospital

2. Why Participate in a Support Group Meeting? • Increase a new parents’ acceptance of a difficult situation and give them resources and support to help them cope. • Provide a safe environment in which families can share their feelings.

3. Why a Support Group?: (continued) • Help new parents feel less alone because they see others going through similar experiences. • Offer comfort in a way that family and friends may be unable to provide.

4. Why a Support Group?: (continued) • Encourage parents to become advocates for their families and for themselves. • Assist new parents’ in their transition from hospital to home.

5. Why a Support Group?: (continued) • Payback for your experience in NICU • Want to make someone else’s experience better than yours was!

6. The Training Meeting • Introduction to Parent Support. (Description and Goals) • Share your story. (Reasons for attending) • Provide contact information. Name (spelling), phone numbers, address and e-mail addresses.

7. The Training Meeting (continued) • Board Positions: Descriptions explain board positions and identify expectations and time commitments. • Programs & Committees: Descriptions for all Parent Support programs and committees.

8. Types of Support Support can come in many forms: • One to one support by in-person visits or telephone calls • On-line support – e-mail • Therapeutic support • Informational support • Social activities • Web-based support

9. How “We” Support(attachment) • In - Hospital Visits: Volunteers make personal visits to new parents at their babies bedside, or with a mom on hospital bedrest. These visits may be arranged by the Support Specialist, (as a match) or may be spontaneous when the volunteer is at the hospital. •Parent Meetings: Volunteers attend Parent Meetings with new parents on different days of each week. Educational meetings as well as information and support are given to new families. Sign up is done several months prior to meeting dates.

10. How We Support:(continued) • Ante-partum support: Volunteers meet bedrest patients and talk about being hospitalized on bedrest. All stable bedrest moms are invited to attend BedBuds lunch on Wednesday. Moms are taken by wheel-chair to the lunch site and spend an hour or more talking to each other, P to P Specialist and volunteers who have spent time on bedrest. Activities might include: Survivor Beads, scrapbook kits, books, crafts, etc.

11. How We Support: (continued) • Telephone Visits: With permission of the new parent, a match might be made by the Support Specialist. If a volunteer has had a similar hospital experience this match could be made to help the new parent understand what is going on and that a Graduate Parent has survived the experience. • Web-based communication: Volunteers may be given an e-mail address (with permission from the new parent) to visit via e-mail. These contacts can be very valuable for new parents, as they are done on the new parents’ time; when it is most convenient for them. Also, they may send an e-mail at any time – day or night.

12. So… Should I Volunteer? An effective graduate parent should: • Be emotionally ready to talk about their own crisis. • Be a good listener, allowing others to talk. • Be open-minded, respecting others who may have different opinions from yours. • Accept people with different cultural, ethnic, religious, or socioeconomic backgrounds. • Accept constructive criticism

13. What “is” a Graduate Parent? A. Someone To Provide Support, Information and Referrals in the community ● Seems to have successfully worked through their own experience ● Can empathize, not just sympathize

14. What “Is” a Graduate Parent?(continued) • A Listening Ear ● Listens carefully to what a new parent says – “active listening” ● Validate what is being said C. A Shoulder to Cry On ● Allow the expression of honest emotions ● Do not be afraid to express your own emotion; happiness, sadness or grief.

15. What “Is” a Graduate Parent?(continued) D. A Resource Center ● Know local resources, or - who to call. ● Can provide information, such as literature, articles, books and websites for new parents/families ● Knows from experience what the new parent might need.

16. What “Is” a Graduate Parent?(continued) E. A Guide ● Help empower parents to problem solve. (do not do it all for them) ● Recognize when to refer to a professional. (coordinator, nurse manager, social work)

17. What “Is” a Support Parent?(continued) • Record Keeper ● Keep a current file on all contacts. Phone #’s addresses, e-mail etc. ● Make notes of contacts with new parents ● Give Support Specialists reports on contacts; especially concerns ● Keep track ofvolunteer hours. Also keep receipts for phone calls, gas mileage or supplies; and turn in at the designated time.

18. What “Is” a Graduate Parent?(continued) • Someone who will respect confidentiality: (Must practice HIPPA requirements) ● In discussion with another Graduate Parent or a Unit professional, do not use the new parent’s name unless given permission to do so. ● Listen to what the parent has to say. Do not be critical of decisions made, or take sides if a couple disagrees. Refer to appropriate professional.

19. What “is” a Graduate Parent ? (continued) • Confidentiality (continued) ● Do not criticize Unit professionals, other parents or “hospital policy” ● Must report child abuse, spousal abuse or suicide threats to a Support Specialists.

20. What “is” a Graduate Parent ? (continued) • All members of Parent Support are a part of the University Health Center team. • You must act in accordance with the rules and regulations set aside by the University of Utah Hospital.

21. What A Graduate Parent “Is Not” • You are not a medical expert. ● Do Not give medical advice or statistics. ● You can help to clarify questions to ask professionals. ● You must refer questions to; doctors, nurses or social workers

22. What a Graduate Parent “Is Not”(continued) • You are not a Psychologist or a Therapist! ● Do not get involved in a new parent’s personal life. ● Make referrals to professionals when necessary .

23. What a Graduate Parent “Is Not”(continued) C. You are not a “Miracle Worker” ● Avoid saying “everything will be alright” You do not know that. ● Help new parents realize that there may be more than one choice.

24. What A Graduate Parent “Is Not”(continued) ● Do not allow a new parent to take advantage of you, your time, energies or your pocketbook. ● Make suggestions of other sources for babysitting, transportation etc. This shows your interest, sets limits for you, and encourages new parents to accept these tasks for themselves.

25. Is Volunteer Training Important? The training session will help you: • Learn procedures & protocol • Develop personal relationships • Find out if you are emotionally removed enough from your own situation • Liability issues are addressed

26. Developing a Relationship • Develop Rapport: ● Imagine the new parent’s present feelings ● Ask about what and how the new parent is feeling ● Match the individual’s voice, tone, rate of speech, intonation, etc. This will help the new parent feel more comfortable and free to “talk” ● Establish Trust 1. Use a warm tone to your voice 2. Speak slowly 3. Do not act as if you have to run-off. 3. Seem sure of yourself. Your confidence may lessen a new parent’s anxiety.

27. Developing a Relationship: (Continued) B. Attitudes that Encourage Communication ● Convey warmth and respect. Help new parents realize that you accept their responses to a situation. ● Show Empathy. Realize that though your experiences may have been similar, you do not truly know what the person is feeling. Allow the parents to express their feelings as their own and not yours.

28. Developing a Relationship: (Continued) ● Convey Respect 1. Respect privacy 2. Visit or call when you say you will 3. Respect the new parent’s emotions ● Offer Hope 1. Let the new parent know that you recognize the pain and fear they may be experiencing 2. Help them to realize that they can survive the experience even if it is not what they expected.

29. Are You Really Listening?Be an Active Listener: • Remove Distractions. Make time to listen or postpone the talk to when you have more time. • Stop Talking! You cannot listen if you are talking. (Do not overwhelm the new parent with what “your” baby did, or what you went through. • Put the talker at ease. Help them feel that they are free to talk. Show them than you want to listen. • Listen to understand rather than to reply. Do not be preparing your answer while they are talking. • Empathize. Try to put yourself in the place so that you can see their point of view. “Remember” • Be patient, allow plenty of time and do not interrupt. • Keep calm

30. Be An Active Listener: • Do not argue or criticize. Doing so will put the individual on the defensive. • Recognize that the new parent is someone who might have very different ideas from you. • Try not get too emotionally involved. (Get help from coordinator, social work or nurse) • Be willing to put aside your own feelings. • Know that feelings are different. (Do not expect a parent to change to your way of thinking) • Trust in the new parents’ ability to handle their own feelings, to work through them and to find solutions to their problems.

31. Roadblocks to Effective CommunicationAvoid these actions: • Offering personal opinion or false hope • Threatening • Moralizing • Providing solutions • Taking responsibility away • Judging/Criticizing • Labeling/Stereotyping • Denying reality • Invading privacy • Diagnosing • Multicultural aspects (do not know or understand what the culture dictates)

32. Questions for Parent Volunteers • Are there any issues from your NBICU days that continue to distress, trouble or irritate you? • How would you handle someone whose religious views were very different from your own? • How would you handle a parent who does not visit their baby or does so in a very different way than you did? • How would you handle Adoptive Parents or Teen Moms?

33. Role Play Questions: What if ?... • A parent seems extremely angry and possibly talking about suing their doctors and/or the hospital? • A parent seems to be depressed and possibly suicidal? Admits to abuse? • A parent exaggerates their baby’s story or seems to not always be telling the truth? • A parent does not believe they are receiving proper medical information or attention?

34. Role Play Questions(Continued) What if ? • A mother refuses to breastfeed or has problems with it? • A mother fears that she caused her babies condition? • A mother or father tells you that they do not feel like a parent? • A baby dies?

35. What’s Next?... New volunteers will: • Be assigned a mentor & expect follow-up • Complete required “paper work” (Must complete and return to get Hospital Volunteer ID) • Be considered in training until after they have attended a training session and facilitated a minimum of two parent nights with a mentor volunteer or a Support Specialist.

36. What’s Next… (continued) All Parent Support volunteers must: • Have a background check done by Community Outreach Department. • Receive a Hepatitis immunization • Receive a TB test • Receive a flu shot • Have photo ID for security purposes ( all are done at no cost to the volunteer)

37. What’s Next?... (continued) Please… if you have any questions or concerns about what you are expected to do… Talk to us!!! We want your experience to be gratifying and enjoyable!

38. Contact Information • My Mentor Parent: • Parent to Parent Office: Becky Hatfield – 801-581-2098 becky.hatfield@hsc.utah.edu • March of Dimes NICU Family Support: Tawna Burton – 801-587-8366 tburton@marchofdimes.com