Fluency: Varying Sentence Structure

1. Fluency: Varying Sentence Structure HOW CAN I GET MY STUDENTS TO INFUSE THE ADVANCED SENTENCE STRUCTURES THEY LEARN INTO THEIR WRITING?????

2. WRITE!!! • You have five minutes to write about WHATEVER you want • Audience: Teachers (professional writing) • Purpose: You choose • Remember, based on your audience, it should be academically sound writing (follow the rules) • If you can’t think of anything, write about your day today, or a problem you have had this week

3. What is fluency??? Sentence Fluency (based on the 6+1 rubric)Advanced/5: The writing has a natural flow and rhythm.A. Varied sentence structure and length demonstrate conscious planning.B. The sentences are rhythmic and graceful.Acceptable/3: The writing moves mechanically.A. The writer shows control over simple sentence structure, but uses complex sentences infrequently.B. The sentence rhythm is attmpted but inconsistent.Unacceptable/1: The writing moves awkwardly.A. The sentences tend to be choppy, incomplete, or rambling.B. The sentence rhythm is clumsy and jarring. Instructions: PUT YOUR WRITING AWAY – WE’LL COME BACK TO IT. FIRST, I NEED TO BRIEF YOU ON THE WHERE MY STUDENTS WOULD BE BEFORE I WOULD TEACH THIS LESSON!

4. What we’ve covered at this point: 1) Add an infinitive phrase: Before: All I wanted to do was improve my score in timed writing and getting those improved scores became very important to me. After: To improve my timed writing score I should practice timed writing. 2) Use a subordinating conjunction to combine sentences: Before: I thought I did excellent on my timed writing test. My grade was much lower than I thought. After: I thought I did excellent on my timed writing test until I saw my grade. 3) Change a statement to a question in quotes: Before: My friend and I thought about abandoning our friend as the bear attacked. After: I turned to Bill and asked, "Should we warn Terrance or just go?" 4) Add a present participial phrase (that's a phrase beginning with a word that ends in 'ing'). Before: We ran faster than we had ever run before as the big bear ripped out Terrance's guts with its paw. After: Looking on in dismay as the bear ripped out Terrance's guts, we awoke from our startled state and ran. 5) Join two sentences with a comma and a coordinating conjunction (and, but, for, nor, yet, so) and create a compound sentence. Before: We knew we didn't have to outrun the bear. We had to run a little bit faster than Terrance. After: We knew we didn't have to outrun the bear, but we did have to outrun Terrance. 6) Add dialogue: Before: We told Terrance to get out of the tent and run. After: I yelled, "Terrance, there's a grizzly bear outside the tent! Run!" 7) Start with an ly word: Before: I was sad when I saw Terrance's body strewn across the mountain. After: Sadly, we looked at Terrance's mangled body. 8) Start the sentence with a prepositional phrase: Before: I ran really fast the moment I saw Terrance's arm torn off and thrown across the campsite. After: At that moment, I ran faster than I'd ever run.

5. How I taught the info on the previous slide. • I fell and hurt my knee. I was running too fast. • Combine these sentences and start it with an verb that ends in –ing. • Start a sentence with a word that ends in –ly • Go through the stages of showing students, giving direct instruction to mimic (like in the 2nd bullet point), and having them create their own sentences that mimic the structure • Spend time having students re-order their own sentences so they learn how to add introductory clauses by restructuring • Consider creating a sentence wall where you collect sentences that follow various structures

6. Now, OBSERVE! Short Choppy 3rd grade: The opposite problem! Poetry is difficult. I don't write it very well. My English professor in college agrees with me. He sent me a book. He sent me Poetry for Dummies. I felt stupid after seeing it. I still talk to the professor. We don't talk much about poetry. He sent me that book, after all. We do talk about our chidren. I asked for his recommendation on poetry books for children. He suggested something to me. He suggested they teach me poetry. He really humiliated me. I am over it now. I talked to my therapist about it. I decided to do a poetry extravaganza. I went to the library with my kids. I chose 20 poetry books. They voted on the top 5. That's why I'm writing this. Poetry, the bane of my existence, an activity, enjoyed by my English professor that tormented me, a college graduate, for many years. My professor, still a good friend of mine who converses with me from time to time about literature and other tidbits, told me I was not very good at poetry, going as far as to send me a copy of a book, a rather useful yet insulting book, entitled Poetry for Dummies, which, although intended as humor, hurt my feelings. I talked to my therapist, a rather good man who, like me, has a general disdain for poetry, and he told me I should have a poetry extravaganza with my children--Tom, Joe, and Mary--and let them see if they enjoy poetry.

7. The invitation to appreciate: On one corner of my dresser sits a smiling toy clown on a tiny unicycle--a gift I received last Christmas from a close friend. The clown's short yellow hair, made of yarn, covers its ears but is parted above the eyes. The blue eyes are outlined in black with thin, dark lashes flowing from the brows. It has cherry-red cheeks, nose, and lips, and its broad grin disappears into the wide, white ruffle around its neck. The clown wears a fluffy, two-tone nylon costume. The left side of the outfit is light blue, and the right side is red. The two colors merge in a dark line that runs down the center of the small outfit. Surrounding its ankles and disguising its long black shoes are big pink bows. The white spokes on the wheels of the unicycle gather in the center and expand to the black tire so that the wheel somewhat resembles the inner half of a grapefruit. The clown and unicycle together stand about a foot high. As a cherished gift from my good friend Tran, this colorful figure greets me with a smile every time I enter my room.

8. Let’s practice different structures so that we can infuse them into our writing. • Each small group will receive a packet of sentence puzzle pieces • The pieces are color coded: red goes with red, blue with blue, etc. • For each same-colored group of puzzle pieces, create as many different sentences as you can. Use different types of clauses and different structures. With each sentence you create, you will have to leave out certain pieces. • You have 15 minutes

9. PRACTICE BECAUSE How many different sentences structures can you create with the following components? Example: Intro clause with a conjunction: Because the girl said thank you, Grandma gave her more food. ZOEY SAID THANK YOU TRYING TO BE POLITE . ; , WHEN GRANDMA GAVE HER MORE FOOD

10. Other sentences: • Trying to be polite, Zoey said thank you when Grandma gave her more food. (complex) • When Grandma gave her more food, Zoey said thank you. (complex) • Grandma gave Zoey more food (simple) • Grandma gave Zoey more food; she said thank you. (compound)

11. Return to your writing • Variable B: Count the number of sentences that start the word “the,” “there,” or a subject. • Variable A: Count the number of sentences that start with a word a present progressive verb (-ing), an adverb (-ly), a preposition, or a conjunction (because, but, etc.) • Write your calculations as A:B • At minimum, your ratio should be one to one. If you’re already there, challenge yourself to increase it to 3:1.

12. Revision stage • After having students calculate their a to be ratio, I would normally have them revise their work. On another day I would implement another revision exercise: • Highlight: • YELLOW: Simple sentences (one independent clause consisting of a subject and predicate.) • PINK: Compound sentences (two independent clauses joined by a comma and a conjunction or a semicolon) • ORANGE: Complex sentences (an independent clause preceded by or followed by a dependent clause)

13. REVISE! • Rewrite your paragraph incorporating all three sentence structures, and working to improve your improve your fluency ratio

14. Sources: • Everyday Editing by Jeff Anderson • Mechanically Inclined by Jeff Anderson • Mini Lessons for Revision by Susan Geye • Mrs. Sherman – an English teacher from high school