Sexual addiction and space

1. Sexual addiction and space Ken Wells and TerrinaPicarello Psychological Counseling Services Scottsdale, Arizona 480-947-5739 pcs@pcsearle.com www.pcsearle.com

2. 3 KINDS OF POWER • 1. Power Over – equates to domination or force (also includes flipside—rebellion) • 2. Power Within – One’s own centeredness, one’s grounding in one’s own beliefs, wisdom, knowledge, skills, culture and community. • 3. Power With – Exercise cooperatively among equals • --Truth or Dare: Encounter with Power, Authority, and Mystery, pgs 8-20, Starhawk

3. Neural Circuit Affected by Power Over PFC PFC Cing Cing BG BG Thal Thal

4. Interpersonal Neurobiology of Power Over

5. PATRIARCHY • Involves the promotion of male privilege of being male dominated, male identified and male centered. • Organized around an obsession with control and involves as one of its key aspects the oppression of women.

6. MALE DOMINANCE • Positions of authority – political, economic, legal, religious, educational, military or domestic are generally reserved for men. • Creates power differences between men and women. • Promotes the idea that men are superior to women.

7. MALE IDENTIFICATION • Core cultural ideas about what is considered good, desirable, or preferable are associated with how we think about men and masculinity.

8. MALE CENTEREDNESS • Focus of attention is on men and what they do. • Fuels men taking up too much space – most standards of admiration and stories of interest will focus more on men than on women. • Emphasis is on men to filling the standards of patriarchal manhood, which usually means men take up too much space through competition.

9. OBSESSION WITH CONTROL • Control becomes the cultural standard for a truly superior human being which is then used to justify men’s privileged position.

10. Patriarchy • (1) hierarchy is the only alternative to chaos • (2) men are made in the image of a masculine God and have special relationship with God because of being male • (3)patriarchal heterosexuality is “natural” and same-sex attraction is not • (4)that because men neither bear or breast feed children, this is the reason that a man cannot feel a compelling bodily connection to children • (5)that at some level every woman, gay or straight, wants a “real man” who knows how to “take charge of things” including her • (6) that females cannot be trusted, especially when they are menstruating or accusing a man of sexual abuse.

11. Today’s cultural view • Today’s cultural view of what it means to be a real man- protector, provider and producer-to be invulnerable, autonomous, independent, unemotional (except for anger and rage)always right, and in command of every situation, rational, logical, self- sufficient, cool under pressure, forceful, decisive, competitive, and tough always

12. References • Martens, Willem H.J., (2005). Shame and Narcissism: Therapeutic Relevance of Conflicting Dimensions of Excessive Self-Esteem, Pride, and Pathological Vulnerable Self. Annals of the American Psychotherapy Assn. Vol 8(2), 10-17. • Newberg, A.B., Wintering, N.A., Morgan, D., Waldman, M. R., (2006) The measurement of regional cerebral blood flow during glossolalia: a preliminary SPECT study. Psychiatry Res. Nove. 22, 148(1): 67-71. • Arden, John, B., Linford, Lloyd, (2009). Brain Based Therapy with Adults, Evidence based Treatment for Everyday Practice. New Jersey, John Wiley & Sons. • Newberg, A.B., Waldman, M. R., (2010). How God Changes Your Brain. Ballantine. • Siegel, Daniel, J., (2001). The Developing Mind: How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are. New York, Guilford Press.