1 / 21

an addiction specialist looks at sexual addiction

Sex. Why should we talk about sex?Because we don'tSex is dirty, full of shame, secretIf there is a secret you want to carry to your grave, it'll get you drunk/loadedWe don't want you to relapseThe single most frequent cofactor in relapse has something to do with sex. Normal Behavior. Does anyone know anyone who doesn't have sex?Therefore having sex is normal behaviorWhat would happen if no one had sex?Therefore having sex is necessary behaviorCan you become addicted to behavior that is 273

omer
Download Presentation

an addiction specialist looks at sexual addiction

An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author. Content is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use only. Download presentation by click this link. While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server. During download, if you can't get a presentation, the file might be deleted by the publisher.

E N D

Presentation Transcript

    1. An Addiction Specialist Looks At Sexual Addiction Ken Roy, MD River Oaks Hospital Tulane Department of Psychiatry Addiction Recovery Resources of New Orleans 504-780-2766 www.arrno.org

    3. Normal Behavior Does anyone know anyone who doesn’t have sex? Therefore having sex is normal behavior What would happen if no one had sex? Therefore having sex is necessary behavior Can you become addicted to behavior that is both normal and necessary?

    4. Addiction to Normal Behaviors If a behavior has a negative effect on one or more of the seven major areas of life - and we don’t stop doing it Just like: Compulsion Loss of control Continued use in the face of negative consequences

    5. Levels of Sexual Addiction Level One Addictive behavior that involves normal sexual activity Level Two Involves nuisance kinds of criminal sexual activity Level Three Horrific kinds of criminal sexual activity

    6. How Many of Us Are Involved? Level One 90% at some time in our using careers Level Two Unknown – 12% - 25% as victims Level Three Unknown – 60% of females & 40% of males are victims

    7. Learned vs. Genetic Addictions Genetic addictions Alcoholism Drug addictions Learned addictions Sex, work, exercise, food, gambling, internet People addiction, or Co Dependency

    8. How Would You Learn? Family dysfunction - distorted Core Beliefs I am a bad, unworthy person Trauma -> Abuse = Shame No one would love me as I am Absence of Unconditional Love My needs would never be met if I had to depend on others Sense of abandonment and absence of nurturing Sex (Love) is my most important need Inappropriate Sexual Messages (Sexual Trauma)

    9. How Would You Act? Distorted core beliefs I am a bad, unworthy person Trauma -> Abuse = Shame No one would love me as I am Absence of Unconditional Love My needs would never be met if I had to depend on others Sense of abandonment and absence of nurturing Sex (Love) is my most important need Inappropriate Sexual Messages (Sexual Trauma)

    10. How It starts Distorted core beliefs I am a bad, unworthy person Trauma -> Abuse = Shame No one would love me as I am Absence of Unconditional Love My needs would never be met if I had to depend on others Sense of abandonment and absence of nurturing Sex (Love) is my most important need Inappropriate Sexual Messages (Sexual Trauma)

    11. Developing a Cycle

    12. Why About Me? My own story Multiple relationships Recovery “Coincidences” After ninth step Promises No longer regret the past, or wish to shut the door on it

    13. How it Goes

    14. Other Levels

    15. How it Ends

    16. If You Identify Specific 12-Step meetings SAA, SLAA Primary 12-Step meeting 1st fourth and fifth step About drinking and drugging 2nd fourth and fifth step About relationships One way or the other – Deal With It!

    17. Sexually Addicted Relationship If the measure of the success of the relationship is the value of the sex in the relationship If the reward for “good” behavior is sex If the punishment for “bad” behavior is withholding sex If the focus of the relationship is on sex

    18. Sexual Co Dependency Focus and self worth dependent on the behavior of another – in this case, sex Co Dependent will often: Invade the person, belongings and schedule of the sex addict Behave flirtatiously, dress flirtatiously or even have sex with others to control the behavior of the addict Focus on another to the neglect of self

    19. Love is Not a Feeling True adult love is a decision To take an interest in and make a commitment to the spiritual and emotional well being of another The types of love Filial = what we feel for relatives Eros = I want to make a baby with you Agape = true adult love Success in love (relationship) depends on expectations of love in a relationship

    20. What is Life All About? Not about winning Probably about some of the things that we don’t learn well if we grow up in dysfunction Intimacy Unconditional love The ability to nurture and be nurtured A relationship with a power greater than ourselves

    21. If This Touched a “bad” Place Listen to your feelings They’re important Access your support system Use your staff Get ready to begin healing The road to recovery is directly through pain

More Related