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The Disaster of Labeling and Blaming Bullies

How blaming bullies increases your suffering

NathanSegal
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The Disaster of Labeling and Blaming Bullies

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  1. The Disaster of Labeling and Blaming Bullies All rights reserved. This document, The Disaster of Labeling and Blaming Bullies is Copyright © Nathan Segal, 2017. This document is distributed with the understanding that the publisher has made every effort possible to make sure that the information contained herein is truthful and accurate. When necessary, information has been changed or updated, to keep the information as current as possible. Disclaimer What you are about to read is not legal advice, nor is the author a lawyer. If there is any doubt about the veracity of the information contained in this document, the services of a competent professional should be sought. You should also consult with an appropriately qualified professional before making any life changes. Due to the rapidly changing state of technology, the publisher/copyright holder does not accept any responsibility for any liabilities resulting from the decisions made by the purchasers of this document. Note: This document contains affiliate links. If you purchase something from one or more of these links, I will receive a commission. For more information, write to me at visualartist49@gmail.com or call me at (408) 844-4851. I’m on PST. You can also visit my website, which is LifeAfterBullying.net or my YouTube channel. The Disaster of Labeling and Blaming Bullies On many forums and groups, I see how an abuser is labeled as a "narcissist," "Narc" or "loser," in addition to seeing people heaping plenty of blame on the abuser.

  2. Labeling and blaming is a disaster for several reasons: ●It creates polarization. ●If you experience abuse, you become a victim, and the abuser becomes the perpetrator. ●It places you, the abused person, in a place of imagined moral superiority over the abuser. ●While your story may garner sympathy, it will keep you stuck. There are two sides to every story. If you experience abuse, you are not blameless. If you look at what happened, honestly and fearlessly, you will realize you have contributed to your pain and suffering. Thinking about the truth can be painful. If you are or have been in an abusive relationship, at some point you must take responsibility for what happened to you and stop labeling and blaming the other party. No one will do it for you. A key way of taking responsibility is to start looking at the thoughts and beliefs that caused your problem in the first place. This post struck a huge nerve with many people. Some claimed that I did not know what I was talking about; some readers accused me of being condescending, and still others told me that the abuser is always 100% wrong; that it is never the fault of the victim. What I have said is my understanding, based on hard practical experience. If you want freedom from your suffering, you must face every bit of pain, and that includes taking responsibility for your part in the abuse. It is never one-sided. To learn more about relationships and to free yourself from destructive patterns, I recommend the book “I Need Your Love: Is It True? By Byron Katie.

  3. The bottom line is this, if you want to recover from the trauma of bullying, you MUST get the bully out of your life. If you do not, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to recover. When the Bully is No Longer in Your Life For some people, getting the bully out of their lives is enough and they will begin to recover. Others have been traumatized by the ongoing harassment which has caused a psychological injury, sometimes known as PTSD, or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. If this has happened to you, you know you’re in trouble. Fortunately, help exists. I work with Hamish Bayston, a coach who specializes in working with victims of bullying. With his coaching, you can remove the trauma of bullying from your life, change your limiting beliefs, stop the obsessive thinking and begin to live a normal life, free of the trauma of bullying. For more information, write to me at visualartist49@gmail.com or call me at (408) 844-4851. I’m on PST. You can also visit my website, which is LifeAfterBullying.net or my YouTube channel. If you write to me, I will respond within 48 hours.

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