Teen Dating Violence

1. Teen Dating Violence Samantha Benton Education Coordinator Bridges: Domestic & Sexual Violence Support

2. Teen Dating Violence • Februaryis teen dating violence awareness month • 1 in 3 teenagers experience some form of dating abuse • You may have heard teen dating violence called: • Relationship Abuse/Violence • Intimate Partner Violence • Dating Abuse • Domestic Abuse • Domestic Violence

3. What is Dating Violence? • A pattern of abusive or controlling behavior(s) in a dating relationship. • Partners are not equal in the relationship • It is about powerand control • Types of Abuse: • Emotional • Peer pressure, isolation/exclusion • Verbal • Threats/intimidation, blaming • Physical • Sexual

4. How Can You Tell If A Relationship Might Become Abusive? Warning Signs or Red Flags • Checking your cell phone, email, or social media sites without permission • Putting you down • Extreme jealousy or insecurity • Explosive temper and/or mood swings • Isolating you from family or friends • Telling you what to do or who you can be friends with • Making false accusations • Physically hurting you in any way** • Possessiveness • Controlling your appearance • Pressuring for sexual activity

5. What Is Love? • Understanding • Honest • Open communication • Safe • Respectful • Trusting and supportive • Negotiation and fairness • Equal power • Accountability

6. True or False? Abuse in relationships happen to both men and women.

7. True Abuse happens at a higher rate to women but it does happen to men.

8. Cycle of Violence • Walking on egg shells • Partner may feel like they can’t do anything right • Can sense something might happen • Apologies • Promises for the future • Gift giving is common • Abuser might place blame on someone or something else • Episode of Violence

9. How Can We Help? • 24-Hour Support 603-883-3044 • One-on-one support • In-person or over-the-phone • Answer your questions • Assist in filing restraining orders • Provide support at court, at police departments, or at the hospital • Confidentialand free services • Connect you to other community resources

10. Why Don’t You Just Break Up? • Love • Hope • Fear • Believes the abuse is normal • Shame and embarrassment • Guilt • Low self-esteem • Social/peer pressure • Distrust of adults or authority • Don’t know where to get help • Reliance on the partner

11. True or False? Most teens who were in a violent relationship told someone about it.

12. False Only 33% of teens told someone that they were in a violent relationship.

13. Rihanna and Chris Brown “Even if it’s a mistake, it’s my mistake,” Rihanna reported to Rolling Stones magazine.

14. How To Help A Friend? Helpful: • Listen • Believe them • Be supportive and non-judgmental • Acknowledge you are concerned • Talk about safety • Encourage victims to get help • Hold abusive partners accountable Not Helpful: • Gossip about their business • Give them ultimatums

15. Can Abusive Partners Change? • Change is possible but someone has to wantto make changes • It is a long process • It is not about their anger • It takes dedication • It takes professional help to change • Programs found a low success rate in changing partner’s behaviors

16. Bridges Contact information • Nashua Office: • 33 East Pearl Street • Nashua, NH 03061 • 603.889.0858 • M-F 8:30-4:30 • (Closed Wednesday 1:00-3:00) • Milford Office: • 16 Elm Street, Suite 2 • Milford, NH 03055 • 603.672.9833 • M-F 8:30-4:30 • (Closed Wednesday 12:00-4:30) • 24-Hour Support Line • 603.883.3044 • www.bridgesnh.org

17. A Safe Place Contact Information 24-Hour Support Line 1-800-854-3552 www.asafeplacenh.org Offices located in Portsmouth, Rochester, & Salem

18. Come by the Bridges table during lunch to talk and/or ask questions. If you answer a trivia question you can win a free prize!