Mutuality & Conflict in the Parent & Adult Child Relationship: Teaching & Learning Resources

2. Mutuality & Conflict in the Parent & Adult Child Relationship:Teaching & Learning Resources Dennis R. Myers, Ph.D Associate Dean, Graduate Studies School of Social Work Baylor University Dennis_Myers@baylor.edu Association for Gerontology in Higher Education Annual Meeting

3. Why Go Here? • Emerging area of family life • Reinforce normative and generational realities of the life course • Need for greater understanding and intentionality in the relationship

4. Contract Purpose: Enrich instruction on the older parent & adult child relationship Methods: Focus on everyday and reciprocal relationships Facilitate infusion of content into existing courses Propose & evaluate learning strategies Promote instructional innovation exchange Deliver instructional modules, audio-visual tools, case vignettes, and bibliographic resources After the annual meeting learning resources for this presentation will be available online. To access the materials, email me at Dennis_Myers@baylor.edu

5. Mother Parent Father Daughter Adult Child Son What strengths do you bring to student learning around this relationship? What causes you concern as you think about teaching in this content area?

6. The Preciousness and Perils of the Relationship

7. Boundaries • Unit of analysis dyad—reciprocal and everyday • Upper level baccalaureate & graduate classes • Infused within existing courses • Applied focus • Student caveat

8. Outcomes Rate the extent to which you think you have mastered the knowledge and skills related to the parent and adult child relationship: • identify benefits of the relationship; • identify sources of conflict; • articulate how cultural and societal forces impact the relationship; • explain why a parent and adult child are experiencing a loss of quality in relationship using multiple micro and one mezzo theoretical frameworks; • explain how age, ethnicity, marital status, and health mediate the quality of the relationship; • identify transitional barriers & relational themes to intimacy between the older parent and adult child; • develop an educational program to strengthen the parent and adult child relationship.

9. The Joys & Challenges of Parents

10. Module #1- Discovering the Landscape of the OPAC Relationship Challenge: How to engage and energize learners around an “everyday” relationship? Objectives Affective Engagement

11. Module #1- Discovering the contours of the OPAC relationship Intellectual Engagement Indicators of Increased Attention Books Television Programs Humor

12. Humor & Adult Parenting

13. Mothers are always looking for signs of improvement in their grown children.

14. Module # 1-Discovering the Landscape of the OPAC Relationship • Factors contributing to increased interest Moving past post parental legacy “Nobody ever told me that being a parent is a lifetime job.”

15. “Parenthood, if it is healthy is always in a state of change and growth. Never at rest and, consequently, life’s least boring job, it must be constantly revised and reworked in response to the natural changes in the family unit.” Vivian Greenberg, Children of A Certain Age

16. Life Cycle of Parenthood Protector Co creator Teacher Wisdom-keeper SOULMATE Colleague Adversary Enabler Mentor

17. Module #1-Discovering the contours of the OPAC relationship Factors contributing to increased interest • Socio-demographic context • Cultural idea of adulthood autonomy • Increased attention to caregiving • Heightened emphasis on personal and spiritual growth and wholeness

18. Module #1-Discovering the contours of the OPAC relationship Learning Approaches Learning Exercise #1: Panel on relational gifts, needs, and expectations

19. Gifts Parents & Adult Children Exchange

20. Parents Give Traditions Affirmation Memories Values Forgiveness Children Give Legacy Appreciation New Experiences Meaning Forgiveness Gift Exchange

21. Cultural & Social Change

22. Module #1-Discovering the contours of the OPAC relationship Learning Approaches • Learning Exercise #2: Resource Team Oral Report—Social, Cultural, and Technological Forces

23. Module #2-Understanding the complexity and context of the OPAC relationship Guiding Questions: • What ideas help in comprehending the complexity of the relationship? • What empirical evidence exists for the efficacy of these ideas? Challenge Objectives Unit of Analysis-dyad & reciprocity

24. Developmental • Filial Maturity • Cyclic • Attachment Parent Adult Child • Structural • Solidarity • Exchange Multi-Generational Families Age Health Gender Ethnicity Micro Economic Status Social Capital Technology Social Networks Mezzo Social Change Demographic Shifts Macro Module #2-Understanding the Older Parent and Adult Child (OPAC) Relationship

25. Module #2-Understanding the complexity and context of the OPAC relationship Developmental Frameworks • Filial Maturity • Attachment

26. Module #2-Understanding the Older Parent and Adult Child (OPAC) Relationship Developmental Frameworks • Cyclic Perspective Parent Adult Child Meaning Meaning Intimacy Intimacy Identity Identity

27. Module #2-Understanding the Older Parent and Adult Child (OPAC) Relationship Developmental Frameworks • Dyadic cog wheeling

28. Module #2-Understanding the complexity and context of the OPAC relationship • Social Network/Convoy • Structural Frameworks Solidarity Exchange

29. Developmental • Filial Maturity • Cyclic • Attachment Parent Adult Child • Structural • Solidarity • Exchange Multi-Generational Families Age Health Gender Ethnicity Micro Economic Status Social Capital Technology Social Networks Mezzo Social Change Demographic Shifts Macro Module #2-Understanding the Older Parent and Adult Child (OPAC) Relationship • Developmental • Filial Maturity • Cyclic • Attachment Parent Adult Child • Structural • Solidarity • Exchange Age Health Gender Ethnicity Micro Economic Status Technology Social Networks Mezzo Social Change Demographic Shifts Macro

30. Module #2-Understanding the complexity and context of the OPAC relationship Learning Exercises • Learning Approach #3:Review and application of theoretical perspectives • Learning Approach #4: Role play

31. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC • Guiding Questions: What transitions challenge the quality of the OPAC relationship? What key themes characterize the response of parents and adult children to these challenges? How can the gerontological professional empower transformational change in the OPAC relationship?

32. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Transitional challenges in the the older parent-adult child relationship • Not So Empty Nest • Fall Shorts • Parent-Child Boundaries • Lifestyle Issues • Sandwich/Club sandwich Stressors • Caregiving

33. Transitional Challenges: Fall Shorts

34. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Transitional challenges in the parent-adult child relationship: Fall Shorts

35. Transitional Challenges: Parent-Child Boundaries

36. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Transitional challenges in the parent-adult child relationship: Parent-Child Boundaries

37. Transitional Challenges: Caregiving

38. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Transitional challenges in the parent-adult child relationship: Caregiving

39. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Key transformative themes • Affirmation vs. Disaffirmation • Forgiveness vs. Justice • Control vs. Choice • Dependency vs. Autonomy • Separateness vs. Relatedness • Letting go vs. Holding On

40. Key transformative theme: Affirmation vs. Disaffirmation

41. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Key transformative theme: Affirmation/Disaffirmation

42. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Key transformative themes(cont.) • Forgiveness vs. Justice • Control vs. Choice • Dependency vs. Autonomy • Separateness vs. Relatedness • Letting go vs. Holding On

43. Relational Themes EmbraceRelease Control Choice Dependency Autonomy Separateness Relatedness

44. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Prescriptions For Reconciliation and Release • Process Unfinished Business • Pursue Reunion and Reconciliation • Provide Educational And Mutual Support Opportunities

45. Module #3-Enriching the bond between the OPAC Gerontological Specialist Interventions • Empower Response-Ability • Communicate Expectations • Celebrate Narratives • Create Soulful Connections

46. Outcome Assessment Conduct student rating of mastery via post-pre test and post test on module outcomes.

47. Mother Parent Father Daughter Adult Child Son