Marriage

2. Marriage • Over time, the institution of marriage in America has been transformed from one of largely economic and social benefit to a new paradigm of love and personal fulfillment. • The social stigma of divorce declined as women’s rights increased. Ultimately divorce was seen as a positive step for women trapped in a patriarchal, loveless, suffocating marriage. • Hence the twin factors of personal fulfillment and women’s rights led to the highest divorce rates in history by the end of the 1970s: ½ of all first-time marriages ended in divorce, with subsequent marriages ending in divorce at even higher rates!

3. Divorce in Film • Under the Hays Code, divorce was rarely if ever portrayed on screen. • The Hays Code stated: “the sanctity of the institution of marriage and home shall be upheld.” • If portrayed it must be “only for sound reasons, as a last resort, and never lightly or flippantly.” • Hence Code films in this genre used annulment, had happy endings where couples got back together, and had bad marriages ending in death (if by murder, then the murderer were punished under the Codes “compensating values” rule). • Therefore, in films from the 1930s to the 1960s people rarely if ever got divorced. In Alfred Hitchcock’s Code-era “divorce” comedy Mr. & Mrs. Smith (1941), Carole Lombard finds out that she is not really married to the man she thinks is her husband—prompting audiences to question the meaning of marriage as an institution.

4. Cinematic Choices • The picture’s look is meant to evoke a sterile, standoffish feel. • High-powered, impersonal Manhattan is used as a backdrop. • The sparse fall and winter seasons are employed just like the barren walls of the Kramer’s apartment to portray life as a joyless, by-the-book struggle rather than happiness of family-photo-filled walls or the more upbeat spring and summer months.

5. The Break-Up • The marriage ends for complex and relatively realistic reasons. • Neither spouse is unfaithful, cruel, abusive, or petty.

6. Dustin Hoffman • Hoffman is widely considered one of the greatest actors in American history and this one of his finest roles. He won an academy award for 1988’s Rain Man and was nominated for The Graduate (1968), Midnight Cowboy (1969), Lenny (1974), Tootsie (1982), and Wag the Dog (1997). His other must-see films include: Papillon (1973), All the President’s Men (1976), and Marathon Man (1976). • He won an academy award for this performance. • He came to the film after going through a painful divorce, which may explain why his performance is so believable. • Hoffman contributed so much to the script that Benton offered him a writer's credit but Hoffman refused—had he accepted he would have shared the Oscar for best screenplay with the Director Robert Benton.

7. Ted Kramer: Before • Career-driven, stereotypical man who expects his wife to raise their child and does not appreciate her until it is too late. • When his wife leaves, he must face a challenge that many women face every day: running a home, caring for a child, and holding down a demanding job. • He is inept in the kitchen using a coffee mug to make French toast with shells for extra crunchiness and burning his hand on the skillet. • He has taken little if any interest in his son’s schooling as he has to ask little Billy what grade he is in and then hands him off to a stranger so that he can get to work. • He is late picking Billy up from the birthday party and Billy tells him “the other mothers” were already there.

8. Ted Kramer: After • Soon, Ted gets to know and falls in love with his son. He realizes that their relationship is the most important thing in his life as they bond over the loss of Joanna and the daily trials of life. • Yet, Ted loses his job and jeopardizes his ability to care for himself and his son. • When Joanna returns, he invests large emotional and financial resources in preserving his role as primary caretaker, knowing it will be an uphill struggle. This suggests an emotional over-dependence on the custodial relationship.

9. Meryl Streep • Widely considered one of the finest actors in film history Streep won her first academy award for this role as best supporting actress. She later won her second Oscar for her lead role in Sophie’s Choice (1982). • She is the all-time leader with 14 Academy Award nominations; in addition to her two wins: The Deer Hunter (1978), The French Lieutenant’s Woman (1982), Silkwood (1983), Out of Africa (1986), Ironweed (1987), A Cry in the Dark (Evil Angels) (1989), Postcards from the Edge (1991), The Bridges of Madison County (1996), One True Thing (1999), Music of the Heart (2000), Adaptation (2003), and The Devil Wears Prada (2007). • She also appeared in Manhattan (1979), Heartburn (1986), and Defending Your Life (1992).

10. Meryl Streep as Joanna Kramer • Young, married, gave up her career to be a stay-at-home mom with a small child. • Married to a domineering, career-driven man who does not appreciate her. • She leaves to “find herself.” • She “finds herself” by returning to her career, getting a divorce, and seeking sole-custody of her son.

11. Portrayal of Children • How is little, 6-year-old Billy portrayed? • He is not the extraordinarily precocious child that we normally encounter in Hollywood. Instead, his understated performance suggests a realism that we don’t often find in child actors. • Is little Billy a spoiled brat? • Did Joanna spoil and smother Billy In order to compensate for Ted’s lack of engagement in family life? • Abandonment: Billy exhibits classic abandonment issues by refusing to listen to his mother’s letter and cooperating with his father after she leaves. • Post-divorce parental relationships: Billy awkwardly meets Phyllis one morning and later asks his father whether he will marry her. • Visitation: Children have a hard time with visitation by the non-custodial parent and we see this when Joanna resurfaces and wants to see Billy. • How will his parent’s marriage and divorce affect him later in life in terms of his relationships with others? Justin Henry, as Billy Kramer, Went on to play the typical precocious child in John Hughes’ Sixteen Candles (1984).

12. Jane Alexander as Margaret Phelps • What do we learn from this character? • Like all the characters, we learn that people are complex and are capable of change. • At the start of the film Ted accuses Margaret of siding with Joanna. Later Ted and Margaret become best friends and she testifies on his behalf in court.

13. The Attorneys • Ted’s Attorney points out that no custody case is clear cut. • Even though 9 out of 10 divorces never go to trial, we see what takes place in a custody proceeding. • In the courtroom scene, the director focuses on the main characters rather than courtroom personnel. Why? Since there is no jury in a child custody case, we the audience act as the jury – studying the people involved and not the attorneys and judge. • How would you describe the tactics used by the attorneys? • Is it fair to say that trials are fact-gathering forums whose ultimate purpose the determination of truth and justice? • How much time do jurors spend sifting through evidence as opposed to observing the people involved in the case?

14. Divorce and Child Custody • Can a father be a better parent than a mother? • The film preceded the era of fathers gaining custody, either full or shared. • At the time of the film, women were awarded custody 90% of the time. Why? • Under the “tender years doctrine,” maternal custody was presumed to be in the best interests of young children. Fathers could only rebut this by showing the mother was unfit and/or that paternal custody was in the child’s best interests. This presumption was widely used through the 1960s and though it began declining, continued to be used into the 1970s. Now there is a more gender-neutral “best interests of the child” standard used to determine custody if contested. • Were you surprised by the outcome of the trial? Under the “tender years doctrine,” shouldn’t the judge have awarded custody to Ted since he never abandoned Billy and had been the primary caretaker for 1 ½ years? • The judge’s failure to correctly apply the tender years doctrine demonstrates the arbitrariness of the legal system and particularly courtroom proceedings? • Today, joint custody has become the norm in many states.

15. No Fault Divorce • Prior to only a few decades ago, divorce was only possible through a showing of fault: abandonment, adultery, or cruelty. Yet legal professionals were disgusted by the system which became a legal charade where honest people were forced to lie under oath. In California, “cruelty” was cited in ¾ of the cases and women had to testify that their husbands abused them. In New York, where cruelty was not grounds for divorce, collusive adultery was set up by both husbands and wives who wanted out of marriage. Many went to Nevada who granted no-fault divorce after six weeks of residence. • California enacted the first “no fault” divorce law in 1969 where either party could cite “irreconcilable differences” and receive a unilateral dissolution of a marriage, regardless of the other parties’ wishes. Fault was no longer a criteria in awarding child or spousal support. • Most states quickly followed California’s lead and today all states have some form of no-fault divorce. Still some make it more difficult than others such as New York’s requirement of a one-year legal separation before a no-fault divorce can be granted. • The criticism of no-fault divorce is that it allows one party to unilaterally destroy the other parties’ life, without any possible recourse. • Ultimately, the film’s message that no one is to blame for the end of a marriage reflects the growing trend toward “no-fault” divorce laws is the United States.

16. Critique: Kramer as Anti-Female • Some are highly critical of this film as demonizing women: Joanna is an emotional wreck, abandoning her child and husband and then trying to steal the child back, despite his happiness, by using the legal system. • Similarly, the film glorifies the abandoned father, making him out to be the hero while his wife is the devil. • Margaret is a traitor for becoming Ted’s friend when she stood by Joanna for years – furthering our sympathy for the abandoned father.

17. Conclusion • The love of a child can both bolster and blind a person. • While being a parent can be a rewarding part of life, it can also be destructive: Joanna is not happy, Ted loses his job, Billy is both spoiled/smothered and neglected. • People are complex and stereotypical gender roles are outdated.

18. Conclusion • Adversarial model of fault divorce has essentially given way to universal, unilateral no-fault divorce. • The tender years doctrine of custody has largely been replaced by a more equal “best interests of the child” test. • Kramer vs. Kramer is a transitional film portraying the old system of fault divorce and the tender years doctrine while recognizing that fathers can be capable parents too.