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Communication

Communication. Building Blocks to a Stronger Marriage. Communication. Essential to any successful relationship God communicates to us through His Son, Heb 1:1-2; Acts 20:32 Children of God communicate with their heavenly Father in prayer, Matt 6:9

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Communication

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  1. Communication Building Blocks to a Stronger Marriage

  2. Communication • Essential to any successful relationship • God communicates to us through His Son, Heb 1:1-2; Acts 20:32 • Children of God communicate with their heavenly Father in prayer, Matt 6:9 • Parents and children must communicate, Eph 6:4 • Husbands and wives must communicate to strengthen their marriages, Eph 5:33

  3. Communication So, why do husbands and wives often fail to effectively and successfully communicate?

  4. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • Begin taking each other for granted • Love does not assume or take for granted; it cherishes and delights in the one it loves, cf. SS 2:3; 3:1-4 • World says “familiarity breeds contempt” • God says get familiar and stay that way! Gen 2:21-23 (18)

  5. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They want to avoid a confrontation • Past conflict can prevent present communication, Prov 21:9, 19 • We convince ourselves of failure before we really try… • Negative: “It won’t do any good anyway!” • Speaking with grace (seasoned with salt) is good, Col 4:6

  6. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • Break the cycle of conflict, silence and avoidance • Soft answer, Prov 15:1-2 • Stop and start, Prov 20:3; Matt 5:23-24 • Commit to listening, Jas 1:19 • Remove anger, Prov 15:18 (29:22) • Always think the best, 1 Cor 13:5 Topic Avoid Conflict Silence

  7. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They are obsessed with their own interests, 1 Cor 13:5 • Sin of selfishness (no self-control), 2 Tim 3:3; Gal 5:23; Phil 2:4 • How we spend our time and money, and where we put our interest equates to what we value and where we put our devotion • Careful of priorities, Lk 12:15; Matt 16:26

  8. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They are obsessed with their own interests, 1 Cor 13:5 • Husband whose first concern is his own satisfaction is not following Christ, Eph 5:25 (1 Tim 5:8) • Wife whose first concern is her own pleasure is not following Christ, Eph 5:22, 24 (Prov 31:27)

  9. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They are obsessed with their own interests, 1 Cor 13:5 • SOLUTION: A concerted effort to be interested in what interests your spouse, Eccl 4:9-12 • You may (probably do) have different interests…but still do things together! • Nurture your common faith, common love, common hopes, common devotion

  10. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They think they are being manipulated by the other, Eph 5:33 • Why does a husband feel manipulated? • Maybe because he is! Silenced by a domineering wife, 1 Pet 3:3-6 • Maybe he is not leading firmly, decisively and consistently, 1 Pet 3:6

  11. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They think they are being manipulated by the other, Eph 5:33 • Why does a wife feel manipulated? • Maybe because she is by a husband who only shows interest in her when he wants something for himself! 1 Pet 3:7 • Leads to resentment, mistrust and animosity • Communication is sharing – not controlling, Rom 12:10

  12. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They think they are too busy, Eph 5:16 • Communication requires a time commitment • “No time” can become excuse for closed hearts • We take time to play, watch TV, video game, ride a bike, read a book, computer, etc. • Must make time to attend to our marriages • Don’t be a Martha! Lk 10:38-42

  13. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They don’t want to hurt the other person, Prov 27:5-6, 17; 28:23 • Do you want to help your spouse? • Are you willing to accept help from your spouse – even when it exposes your shortcoming (or even sin)? • Humble hearts are required to give and to receive rebuke, correction, etc. Rom 12:16

  14. Reasons Husbands and Wives Fail to Communicate Effectively • They don’t want to hurt the other person, Prov 27:5-6, 17; 28:23 • SOLUTION: We must help each other know that we always have their best interest at heart, Eph 5:26-27 • GOAL: Strengthen each other and help one another serve Jesus Christ and go to heaven!

  15. Communication • Marriage without communication is like a car without fuel… • Won’t go far …sputter and die! • Rom 12:9-13, 16: Build Marriage… • Sincerity and goodness (9) • Kind affection and honoring preference (10) • Diligent service (11) • Joyful hope, patient steadfastness & prayer (12) • Sympathetic giving and unity of mind (13, 16)

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