Parenting in the Context of Domestic Violence: Initial Findings

1. Parenting in the Context of Domestic Violence: Initial Findings Children in Crisis Conference, 2013 Claire Troon, FASS, University of Waikato

2. Outline: • Overview of literature • Background to research • Initial findings • Implications

3. Overview of literature: Impact on children • High correlation between domestic violence against a spouse and child maltreatment (Appel& Holden, 1998; Edleson, 1999) • Behavioural, emotional and cognitive functions of children as well as their belief systems (Jaffe, Hurley & Wolfe, 1990; Bancroft & Silverman, 2002) • Development adversely affected (Margolin& Gordis, 2000)

4. Overview of literature: Impact on mothers • Mothers are more stressed and significant undermining of their parenting/authority (Holden & Ritchie, 1991, Holden et al., 1998, Levendosky, Lynch & Graham-Bermann, 2000) • Continuation of violence post-separation (Jaffe, Lemon & Poisson, 2002; Scott & Crooks, 2004) • Day-to-day care and contact arrangements may serve as means to further abuse children and women (McMahon & Pence, 1995; Perel & Peled, 2007)

5. Overview of literature: The batterer as parent • Attitudinal and behavioural characteristics provide grounding for parenting style • Authoritarian parenting practices • Underinvolvement/irresponsibility • Self-centredness (Bancroft et al., 2012; Holden & Ritchie, 1991; Margolin, John, Ghosh, & Gordis, 1996; Peled, 2000). • Maori family violence: • Traditional child-rearing practices: shared responsibility, children are taonga, importance of whakapapa • Breakdown of traditions and values due to colonisation • Traditional Maori child-care practices have changed (Balzer et al., 1997; Kruger et al., 2004)

6. Overview of literature: Recovery in aftermath of violence • Voices of mothers: • Separation of the ‘violent world’ and children’s world’ (Peled and Barak Gil , 2011) • Children ought to have contact with fathers (Tubbs & Williams, 2007; Jaffe & Crook, 2007) • Cannot be ‘good fathers’ unless they change abusive behaviours (Tubbs & Williams, 2007). • Want more attention paid to ‘fathering’ in programmes (Arean & Davis, 2007) • Children’s voices: • Ambivalent about their feelings towards their fathers (Groves el al., 2007; Peled, 2000) • Fathers perceptions: • Shame and remorse (Litton Fox, Sayers & Bruce, 2001) • The ‘good father’ image (Perel & Peled, 2008) • Yearn for close and warm relationships with children (Perel& Peled, 2008)

7. Overview of literature: Facilitating Recovery • Children require a strong bond with non-abusing, nurturing parent (Graham-Bermann & Levendosky, 1998; Jaffe & Geffner, 1998; Margolin & Gordis, 2000) • Mothering interventions: focus on strengths and experiences/ healing mother-child relationship (Levendosky, Lynch & Graham-Bermann, 2000) • Fathering interventions: • Stopping violence programmes: opportunity to address abusive men’s parenting (Scott et al., 2007; Bancroft et al., 2012). • Standard parenting programmes not sufficient : unintended consequences (Bancroft et al., 2012). • Attitudinal and behavioural characteristics to be addressed first (Bancroft et al., 2012; Peled & Perel, 2007; Scott et al., 2007).

8. Purpose of research: • We need to know more about... • Parenting by men who batter: • Implications for father-child and mother-child relationships • Batterers’ perceptions of their parenting role • Intervention • Research objective: • 1. What are the perceptions of women (as victims of domestic violence) and men (as perpetrators of domestic violence) on the impact of violence on children, and the ability to be a mother and father ?

9. Background to research: HAIP • The Hamilton Abuse Intervention Project (HAIP) • Coordinated community response • Curriculum • Pro-feminist model • DAIP/ Power and Control • Culturally adapted • Men’s programmes • Maori and tauiwi • 26 weeks • Women’s programmes

10. Background to research: Methodology • Feminist perspective • Participant recruitment Criteria: Men and women who have children (biological or are the parent/caregiver of children) who resided with one of the parties during the abusive relationship. • Data collection: • Semi-structured interviews with men (4 Maori/ 5 tauiwi) • Focus groups with women (5 Maori /5 tauiwi) • Thematic analysis

11. Initial findings: Impact on children Women’s perceptions: Men’s perceptions: Exposure to violence Suppressed emotions Social learning Child as protector/parent Fear Social Learning Child as protector Children too young

12. Initial findings: Impact on women/mothers Women’s perceptions: Men’s perceptions: Emotional impact Isolation Guilt/ self-blame Supressed anger Controlling parenting Mother-child relationship Becoming protector Manipulation Fear Using child as weapon No Impact(some men)

13. Initial findings: Impact on batterer’s parenting Women’s perceptions: Men’s perceptions: Inactive parent Authoritarian Façade Inactive parent Authoritarian Transgenerational violence Motivation to complete/participate

14. Initial findings: The recovery process Women’s perceptions: Men’s perceptions: • Should have contact • Children need fathers • Importance of Whanau/whakapapa • Better father now • Shouldn’t have contact • Continued abuse Supervised access Diminished bond Remorse

15. Overview: Key findings Significant effects of DV on children and mothers Negative parenting practices evident Violence continues post-separation (contact arrangements) Emphasis on children’s needs in healing in aftermath of violence Becoming a better father- source of motivation for change

16. Implications: intervention/policy and practice • Fathers need intervention to become non-violent parents • Emphasis on: • Ending violence against children's mother • Negative parenting practices • Format/ models? • Safety? • Supporting children’s relationships with non-abusive parent paramount • White Paper on Vulnerable children (2012) • Cultural considerations • Co-ordinated community response

17. Questions/reflections?