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YOU MUST CRITIQUE THE DRAFTS OVER DIAMOND

BA6: To develop the ability to determine what revisions should be made to an early draft of a document.

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YOU MUST CRITIQUE THE DRAFTS OVER DIAMOND

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  1. BA6: To develop the ability to determine what revisions should be made to an early draft of a document. • Description: To complete this assignment, read the initial draft provided and then write an initial paragraph in which you discuss the problems that you see in the current draft. Next, read the revised draft and write another paragraph in which you discuss 1) whether the problems that you saw in the first draft were addressed, 2) whether the revisions fixed other issues that you hadn’t noticed in the draft, and 3) why the revisions are or are not an improvement over the first draft. If you believe other revisions should be made to the draft, conclude your assignment with an explanation of what those are and how the revisions should be made. Your discussion should be 500 - 650 words in length. You may use either of the following sets of drafts for your assignment, but we suggest the drafts on the Diamond essay, since you are more familiar with it. • The drafts are available here: https://raiderwriter.engl.ttu.edu/files/DraftsforBA6FA13.pdf

  2. YOU MUST CRITIQUE THE DRAFTS OVER DIAMOND IF YOU CRITIQUE THE WRONG DRAFTS, YOUR ASSIGNMENT WILL BE DELETED, AND YOU WILL BE ASKED TO REDO THE ASSIGNMENT USING THE CORRECT DRAFTS. ALSO, THE LATE PENALTY WILL STAND.

  3. What you need to do: This is the Grading Rubric. • Focus: You need to thoroughly explore the quality of the drafts and demonstrate an understanding of why both drafts are being examined. • Sources and Evidence: You need to support your critique with evidence from the texts. In other words, directly refer to specific parts of the texts. Avoid being vague or using language that could apply to any draft. • Own Perspective: You need to have authority in relaying your perspective about the effectiveness of the revisions. Make a direct critique of the drafts, and do not default to praising or criticizing drafts in some generic way. • Conclusion: Provide an accurate evaluative statement about the overall effectiveness of the revisions.  Discuss the significance of the problems you identify in both drafts and suggest other ways in which the sample 1.2 draft could be improved. • Communication: Communicate your critique of the revisions effectively.  Have a professional tone.

  4. Okay, so how are we going to do this?!?! • Print out the drafts • Do a side by side comparison – Read draft #1, then read draft #2 • Write down the differences between: • The introductions. • The specificity of audience. • The specificity of rhetorical choices. • The order of rhetorical choices. • Write down why (you think) the student made those changes

  5. Use These Answers as a Framework for your BA6

  6. What you should be reading for in a draft: • Organization & Structure - Are there topic sentencesand transitions? Does the evidence appear in the essay in the same order as they appear in the thesis? • Claims & Evidence - Is the claim consistent throughout? Does the evidence that has been given support the claim? • Analysis v. Summary - Is the essay focusing on analysis in a way that “shows” the reader the connections to audience and purpose, or is the essay just “telling” the reader that there is a connection? • Word Choice - Does the essay use appropriate word choice? Are the rhetorical choices correctly identified? • Logical Flow - Does the argument follow a logical path? Is the essay disjointed? Do the paragraphs communicate with each other or do they standalone? 

  7. When are critiques not helpful?

  8. What is unconstructive feedback? “I liked it.” “I liked the paper, it was good.” “I didn’t like the thesis.” “I didn’t like the quotes.”

  9. As a critic, you can't just say, "I liked it," or "I didn't like it." Instead, you want to focus on the article. Support your likes/dislikes with evidence from the text. Using first person isn’t wrong, but frame it so the that the subject isthe material (i.e. the primary text). Use BECAUSE STATEMENTS – The second draft was stronger because…. I like the choices the author makes because…

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