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1. Husband: “Oh the weather is lovely today. Shall we go out for a quick jog?“ Wife: “Hahaha, I love the way you pronounce ‘Shall we go out and have a cake’!”
2. Daddy did you know that girls are smarter than boys? No, I didn’t know that. There you go.
3. Late one night a mugger wearing a mask stopped a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Scandalized, the man replied, "You can’t do this – I’m a US Congressman!" "Oh! In that case," smiled the robber, "Give me MY money!"
4. A boy breaks on old vase at a rich uncle‘s house. The uncle gets extremely angry and yells: “Do you even know how old the vase was? It was from the 17th century!” The boy sagged in relief: “Oh, good that it wasn’t new.”
5. I’ve always thought my neighbors were quite nice people. But then they put a password on their Wi-Fi.What did the stamp say to the envelope? - You stick with me and I will take you places!
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