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Showing vs Telling • It is important to use showing rather than telling in descriptive writing. Give the reader a picture of what the character in the writing is feeling, or what the place you are describing looks like. Instead of writing: The beach is beautiful, let the reader decide if it is beautiful or not by describing it. Describe it the way it is.
Examples……. • Telling: It is hot outside. Showing: As soon as I stepped outside I was soaked in perspiration. I could actually see steam rising from the pavement. My eyelids were sticky from sweat and I just wanted to find a shady spot and an icy drink.
Telling: He was really angry. Showing: Jake slammed the door so hard the windows rattled. He stomped down the hall in a fury and pounded a locker with his fist. His face was tomato red; no one dared go near him.
Telling: New York is a busy city. Showing: The streets of New York are clogged with people running in all directions. Elbows, body checks, and cramped subway rides are all part of the craziness of New York.
You can see that the showing sentences are much more effective because they give the reader a picture.
Use the following tips for descriptive writing • Use words and phrases that describe sights, sounds, smells and tastes associated with your subject/topic. • Use comparisons. Compare your subject to an object…sharp knife, plum, moon….to give the reader a visual picture of what you are describing. • Be specific and use concrete details. Words such as beautiful and nice are subjective. What may be beautiful or nice to you might not be to your reader. Resist telling the reader how to think or feel; instead force the reader to think by using specific visual pictures. • E.g. Her hair was the colour of a field of wheat and her eyes were ocean blue. (This makes the reader picture a specific form of beauty, without saying: She is beautiful.)
Showing involves more than a long list of adjectives. • Sometimes students misinterpret what is meant my showing. They put all kinds of adjectives in their writing, describing everything from the color of the wallpaper to the shape of their own legs, regardless of whether such detail actually advances their story. • The point of showing is not to drown the reader in a sea of details. Instead, you should pick out only those details that matter!