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The Juggling Show: Finding Time for Work, Family and Self. Presented by: Kathy Riggs USU Extension FCS Agent. Let’s brainstorm!. What do you do for fun? What makes you happy? What do you do to bond with your family/friends? What do you do do you relax?
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The Juggling Show: Finding Time for Work, Family and Self Presented by: Kathy Riggs USU Extension FCS Agent
Let’s brainstorm! • What do you do for fun? • What makes you happy? • What do you do to bond with your family/friends? • What do you do do you relax? • How do you “make time” for the important stuff? • What’s the important stuff?
We have all these great answers… but then … • Why are we still stressed? • Why does it feel like work is taking over? • Why are we single handedly supporting the Excedrin and Tums industry?
Some Basic Facts: • Work and family are central to our way of life • Finding a balance between the two is an issue of great importance • Add “self” to the formula and finding balance among the three: • Is pretty dang tricky • May result in stress
Sources of Stress • Stress comes from two primary sources: • Role strain • Spillover
Role Strain • Occurs when the responsibilities of one role interfere with performing other roles
Spillover • When the conditions and relationships in one area of our lives affect us in another area
So, how do you balance it all? • Analogy of glass balls vs. rubber balls
Glass Balls Family Work What else? Rubber Balls Clean house Daily exercise Home cooked meals What else? How do you tell a glass ball from a rubber ball?
How do you identify and prioritize? • Clarify values • Values guide our actions • Create a list • Column #1 “Family” • What do you value with regards to your family? • What do you want your family to be known for?
How do you identify and prioritize? • Clarify values • Create a list • Column #2 “Work” • What do you value with regards to your work? • What is your work ethic? • What are your career goals?
How do you identify and prioritize? • Clarify values • Create a list • Column #3 “Self” • What do you what to be known for? • What are your personal standards to live by? • What relationships are important to you?
Compare lists • Ask yourself: • Are any of your values in conflict with one another?
Set Realistic Goals and Expectations • Goals help us define how we use our time. • Values give direction to the goals we set • Main problem: Many of us have high expectations about being everything to everybody, performing all of our roles well or being “perfect.”
Setting Priorities & Managing Time • Even when we are efficient in using our time, we may not be effective- we “do things right” but we don’t do the right things.
Here is one way to manage time effectively: • First, we define our goals, and then we ask ourselves these questions: • How do my expectations either foster or interfere with reaching my goals? • Am I balancing my “material” goals with my “people” goals? • How will I know when I have reached this goal? • What do I need to do today to reach this goal?
Letting Go and Understanding Control • Stay in control by letting go • Planning and communication are central to all change. Here are some other ideas to help balance work:
Letting go… • Hold family meetings • Keep weekly or monthly schedules that schedule time for both concrete (“material”) and relational (“people”) goals • Be willing to revise plans when they don’t work or changes need to be made • Understand what we can control and what we can’t
Letting go, continued… • Keep a sense of humor • Remember that effective management is not a single event but a continually evolving process.
Calm your Stress • Practicing relaxation techniques can improve how you physically respond to stress by: • Slowing your heart rate • Lowering blood pressure • Slowing your breathing rate • Reducing the need for oxygen • Increasing blood flow to major muscles • Reducing muscle tension
Health Benefits to Relaxation • Fewer physical symptoms, such as headaches and back pain • Fewer emotional responses, such as anger and frustration • More energy • Improved concentration • Greater ability to handle problems • More efficiency in daily activities
Take a break to meditate http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/meditation/HQ01070 http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/shoulder-stretches/MM00710
Sources • University of Main Extension, Family Issues Facts, Balancing Work and Family. Downloaded 9/17/07 from http://www.umext.maine.edu/onlinepubs/htmpubs/4186.htm • University of Georgia, Managing stress: a guide for college students. Downloaded 9/17/07 from http://www.uhs.uga.edu/stress/relax.html • George Washington University, University Counseling Center, Improving Time Management. Downloaded 9/17/07 from http://gwired.gwu.edu/counsel/index.gw/Site_ID/5176/Page_ID/14098/ • Forever Families, Balancing Family and Work. Downloaded 9/17/07 from http://www.foreverfamilies.net/xm1/articles/work_and_family_balance.aspx • Mayo Clinic.com Need to relax? Take a break to meditate video. Available 9/17/07 from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/meditation/MM00623