Dealing with Difficult People and Situations

1. Dealing with Difficult People and Situations Osher Lifelong Learning Institutes National Conference 2012 Ruth Heller, OLLI at University of Oregon Adrianna Mahoney, OLLI at University of Oregon Adam Brunner, OLLI at Temple University

2. Dominating class discussion Political comments and emails Raising their voice to control conversation Instructors who do not call on women Members who like to give hugs or are overly familiar in their greeting Members who tell jokes slanted against women or men Yelling and outbursts When does disruptive behavior cross the line?

3. Directed insults and belittling comments towards individual members or groups Repeated and unwanted romantic overtures or advances When does disruptive behavior cross the line? Persistent, unwelcome contact outside of class, including phone calls, messages, email, etc. Unwanted or forced physical contact (sexual or otherwise)

4. Framing Our Discussion Prior to dealing with disruptive behavior or misconduct, it is helpful to know how your OLLI program fits into your university organization. How does your university define a student? Risk Management is a good place to start.

5. Social Misconduct Student Conduct and Community Standards Office of the Dean of Students • Property Use: Damage, destruction, theft or unauthorized entry or use of University property. • University Document and Related Property: Forgery, alteration or unauthorized use of University documents, records, keys, student (OLLI) identifications, or services. • Disorderly Conduct: Unreasonable noise or conduct that results in unreasonable annoyance. • Disrupting University: Engaging in behavior that disrupts University function. Example: Going to class under the influence of alcohol or other drugs. • Failure to Comply: Failure to comply with reasonable directions of University or public officials.

6. Social Misconduct Student Conduct and Community Standards Office of the Dean of Students • Harassment: Unreasonable insults, gestures or abusive words directed toward another person that may reasonably cause emotional distress. • Lewd or Indecent Contact • Physical Contact: Physical contact that endangers, threatens, or harms the health or safety of other persons, or behavior that causes a reasonable person to fear such contact. • Unwanted Contact: Repeated or persistent contact or attempts to contact another person when the person making contact knows, or should know, that the contact is unwanted. Example: Asking others to contact a person for you when the person has asked you not to contact him or her anymore.

7. Prohibited Discriminatory Harassment Quid Pro Quo (“this for that”) Harassment [refers primarily to sexual harassment] • When submission to or rejection of demands for sexual favors affects educational or employment benefits, advancements or other related status. Hostile Environment Harassment [can refer to harassment based on sex, gender, race, ethnicity, color, disability, sexual orientation, religion or other category of prohibited discrimination] • serious or pervasive behaviors that create a hostile, offensive or intimidating work or educational environment.

8. Hostile Environment Behaviors that could, according to court cases, contribute to an illegal hostile environment: • Offensive jokes or suggestive comments, threats or insults, whether these are verbal or in writing via email • Propositions, name calling, insulting comments • Suggestive, insulting or intimidating gestures • Displaying or distributing offensive posters, graffiti, cartoon, calendars, etc., including via email • Pinching, touching, grabbing, kissing, hugging (sexual harassment) • Trapping or cornering another person • Violence of any kind

9. Civility Spectrum From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao • Apathy and Distance • Benign Neglect • Examples include overlooking someone in discussion, reducing or minimizing. It “may reflect an unconscious behavior or […]blind spot of the neglectful person.” http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

10. Civility Spectrum From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao • Abject Neglect • “Identified by the intentional nature of the behavior […] a conscious effort to undermine the individual. It is also a signal to other onlookers in the organization that a person does not matter.” • Disrespect • “A further discounting of the experience of the other person […] including verbal abuse, name calling, stereotyping based on race or gender, racial joke making, and so on.” http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

11. Civility Spectrum From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao • Exclusion and Discrimination • Manipulation, Shaming, and Intimidating • Domination, Emotional Abuse, and Harassment • Hostility or Physical Assault http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

13. Intent and Effect In cases of harassment and discrimination, the law does not pay much attention to the intent of your actions. The law pays much more attention to the effect on the other person.

14. Reporting Guidelines When difficult situations have arisen at your OLLI, have you dealt with them internally or with the aid of the university?

15. Reporting Guidelines If proven true, would the alleged offense be classified as a civil case or a criminal case?

16. Civil Case A civil case begins when a person or entity (such as a corporation or the government) claims that another person or entityhas failed to carry out a legal duty owed to the plaintiff. Legal duties include respecting rights established under the Constitution or under federal or state law.

17. Criminal Case A formal accusation prosecuted by the government.It is not the victim’s responsibility to bring a criminal case. In some criminal cases, there may not be a specific victim.

18. Informal Complaints • The person bringing the informal complaint tells his or her story. • No formal investigation. • Because there is no formal investigation, there is no official finding of fault. • Interviewing witnesses is not necessary to this process.

19. Informal Complaints • The complaint is resolved when both parties agree that it is resolved. • Processes that may be used to resolve the complaint include: • Coaching • Third party help • Mediation • Direct discussion between the two parties • Peer advisory board

20. Informal to Formal Complaint A formal investigation may be launched from informal complaints if: • Three complaints are made about an individual • These complaints are similar in nature

21. Formal Complaints • Formal investigation conducted by neutral fact-finder. • Both parties provide their sides of the story. • Witnesses can be interviewed and their information incorporated into the formal investigation.

22. Formal Complaints • If the investigation results in a finding that it is likely, by examination of the preponderance of the evidence (51%), that harassment or discrimination took place, then there is an official finding in the person’s personnel or student file.

23. Formal Complaints • After the investigation is complete, the findings are given to the Affirmative Action Advisory Council (AAAC) or other body designated by policy and administrative rule. • A decision is made about whether it is likely that harassment or discrimination took place. • If a finding of discrimination or harassment is made, then the appropriate office sets the consequences.

24. Reporting Guidelines Do you know when to become involved in difficult situations involving members?

25. Reporting Guidelines Supervisors and administrators in the workplace, as well as faculty in the classroom, are responsible for intervening in a timely and effective manner with inappropriate behaviors at all levels of this pyramid. • Behavior that violates Federal or State law • Behavior that violates administrative rules • Behavior that interferes with work or education

26. Reporting Guidelines While the majority of inappropriate behaviors in the workplace may not be violations of Federal or State law, tolerating such behaviors can lay the groundwork for an environment where discrimination or harassment can flourish.

27. The Legal Framework for Reporting Guidelines The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) state that: • the employer is responsible for discrimination and discriminatory harassment, including sexual harassment, if the employer knows or should have known about the discrimination or harassment.

28. Who is the Employer? The “agents of the employer” could include any person who has: • supervisory responsibility or who otherwise overseesthe operation of a department, classroom, office, program or project • or who speaks for or is perceived as speaking for the institution

29. Your Role as an Agent This means that when you become aware that there may be a problem of harassment or discrimination occurring among members of your staff or faculty, or between any of those you supervise and those with whom they interact in their work at the university, you need to address it.

30. Your Role as an Agent • Take the issue seriously; • Take the member to a private area or offer to do so; • Avoid prejudging the situation; • Speak calmly and consider your body language; • Allow your members to express their concerns and emotions without interruption; • Ask open-ended questions; • Relay to the member that they were right to approach you, and make yourself available for further communications.

31. Your Role as an Agent • Contact the Affirmative Action or appropriate office for advice and assistance; and, • Stay in contact with that office as appropriate.

32. Difficult SituationsTiffany Jackson Case Study Overview Action Taken Results The Experience and Member Response

33. Difficult SituationsBob Johnson Case Study Overview Action Taken Results The Experience and Member Response

34. Civility Spectrum • Tolerance and Inclusion • “Differences are tolerated and are not used as a basis of exclusion from the group.” • Cultivation, Interest and Caring • “A relationship is cultivated with the other person(s), in which both interest and caring are present.” From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

35. Civility Spectrum • Sympathy and Empathy • “There is a sense of sympathy and empathy for painful experiences, whether they occur in the organization or at home.” • Mutuality and Dialogue • “There is a mutual give and take between people, who dialog with one another.” From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

36. Civility Spectrum • Collaboration and Partnership • “There is a willingness to collaborate and to work together, as well as an awareness of the contributions made to the group by each of its members.” • Synergy and Symbiosis • “Where equity and balance exist in a relationship, as well as a personal sense of esteem.” From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf

37. Civility Spectrum • Inspiration • “There is a feeling of belonging in the workplace—people are inspired to contribute to the team and to each other.” From “Civility and Respect: A Behavioral Spectrum” by Dr. AnuRao http://www.mdanderson.org/about-us/for-employees/employee-resources/ombuds-office/images-and-files/ombuds-civility-respect.pdf