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Intimate Relationships

Intimate Relationships. Involve closeness, understanding, risk, informality, trust & confidence. Intimate Relationships: Characteristics. Behavioral interdependence Need fulfillment Emotional attachment Emotional availability. Friends & Lovers . Stages of Love Relationships. Physical

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Intimate Relationships

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  1. Intimate Relationships Involve closeness, understanding, risk, informality, trust & confidence

  2. Intimate Relationships: Characteristics • Behavioral interdependence • Need fulfillment • Emotional attachment • Emotional availability

  3. Friends & Lovers

  4. Stages of Love Relationships • Physical • Psychological • Philosophical, Spiritual

  5. Healthy Relationships Communicating effectively with others bridges differences & contributes to wellness

  6. Communication & Relationships • Complex process • Verbal & nonverbal • Cultural differences • Developmental differences • Symbolic transmission of shared meaning • Perception • Listening

  7. Daydreaming Comparing Rehearsing Being right Identifying Judging Mind reading Filtering Placating Advising Sparing Derailing Barriers to Listening

  8. Active-Reflective Listening • STOP TALKING • Remove distractions • Use attentive body language & voice tone • Empathize with the talker • Be patient • Resist the urge to interrupt • Resist the urge to “fix” • Ask clarifying questions • Clarify your statements

  9. Assertive Communication • Stick to the facts • Determine what you want/need • Communicate specific requests & feelings • Use “I” statements • Use assertive nonverbal communication

  10. When people live, work & spend time together Conflicts are inevitable

  11. “Rules of Fair Fighting” • If the time isn’t right, schedule one that is • Set ground rules, then follow them • Define the problem • State the problem factually, not emotionally • Stick to the subject • Don’t include other people or past issues • Don’t threaten, criticize or injure in any way • Don’t ask for feedback unless you are willing to listen to an honest answer • Listen

  12. Troubles Talk: How Men And Women Respond

  13. Troubles Talk: How Men And Women Respond

  14. Jealousy • Aversive reaction • Causes • Overdependence • Extreme sexual exclusivity • Low self-esteem • External locus of control • Fear of losing control • Resolutions • Examine the source • Don’t enable • Open, honest communication • Ground rules

  15. Ending a Relationship • Choose the right time & place • Advise your partner, in advance, of the need to talk • Seek support • Use respectful assertive, not aggressive or attack, communication • Do not take responsibility for your partner’s feelings or reactions • Know when to say when • Avoid “rebound” relationships • Learn from the experience

  16. How have technological advances changed relationships? Consider: Internet dating/matching services Social networking & communication services (e.g., MySpace) Email

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