Moving Beyond Childhood Family Roles

1. Who Am I, Really? Moving Beyond Childhood Family Roles Were you the good kid in your family? The one who made everyone look good? Or were you the quiet one who stayed off the radar not attracting any attention? Or perhaps you were the rebellious one who constantly got in trouble and did and said whatever you wanted? These scenarios are examples of Pia Mellody’s adapted survival roles created in childhood—respectively the Hero, Lost, and Scapegoat. nbtmmPia Mellody is a pioneer in the field of codependence and her model of developmental immaturity is the foundation of The Meadows approach to therapy. In her book, The Intimacy Factor, Pia describes how these roles “inappropriately persist into adulthood, where [people] become adult actors plagued by self- centered fear, the pain of poor relationships, and an aching lack of intimacy”. Through this amazing process I learned how to become a functional adult—or in other words, “grow myself up.” My inner hero will always be a part of me but by learning how to identify her voice when she is provoked, I am now able to connect with my true self and my functional adult. This has created more intimacy and peace in my life. If you are having trouble in your relationships because you are unable to behave in the ways you would like to, or if feelings of superiority, inadequacy, or rebelliousness drive your behaviors and create wreckage in your life, give one of our intake specialists a call and find out which Rio Retreat at The Meadows workshop best fits you.