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LISTENING TO LEARN. Bennie Good. Notes. Ask speakers what they experienced What were there reactions. Ask listeners how their speakers responded How did they feel playing the role. Listening is…. An essential part of communication Not taught in school A skill that can be learned.
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LISTENING TO LEARN Bennie Good
Notes • Ask speakers what they experienced • What were there reactions • Ask listeners how their speakers responded • How did they feel playing the role
Listening is…. • An essential part of communication • Not taught in school • A skill that can be learned
Why Listening is A Key Skill of Leadership • Connecting • Decision Making • Problem Solving
Listening Thought “Seek first to understand, then to be understood” Steven Covey
Two Types of Listening • Active Listening • Empathetic Listening
Active Listening • Ask questions • Reflect back • Paraphrase • Don’t be judgemental • Observe • Focus • Acknowledge • Respect
Empathetic Listening • Listener puts themselves in speaker’s place • Imagine things from speaker’s point of view • Try to understand how the speaker feels “So when you are listening to somebody, completely, attentively, then you are listening not only to the words, but also to the feeling of what is being conveyed, to the whole of it, not part of it.” JidduKrishnamurti ~ (1895 – 1986) spiritual philosopher
Role Play 2 • Pick a partner • One person is the speaker, the other the listener • Speaker is to talk about something they enjoy, such as hobby, sport or family activity • Listener to follow instructions on card
Monitor your Listening Level • How do you adjust the volume? • Situation? • Environment? • Mental state?
Role Play 3 • Need a volunteer to play the part of a scout who is angry about the way others in the unit are treating him • Den Chief plays the role of the leader
Notes – Role Play 3 • Active • I get it • What I hear is…. • Keep talking scout…but no feedback • Now I hear what you don’t want…what do you want?
Listening in Adversarial Situations Listeners should always strive to create a positive present As opposed to A negative past.
Feedback • Generally feedback is thought of as a painful experience or process
Feedback Notes • Have you ever received advice from someone? • How did it feel to receive feedback? • Have you ever had a chance to tell someone how they can do something better? • How did it feel to be offering feedback
Tips on Giving Feedback • Consider your motives • Is the person receptive? • Deal with behaviors that can be changed • Be specific • Let the person know the impact of the behavior on you • Use “I” to accept responsibility for your own emotions • To make sure the recipient heard you correctly, ask them to repeat or rephrase the feeback
You can give caring feedback without a good technique, but the slickest technique in the world will not hide a lack of caring.
Tips on Receiving Feedback • Seek out feedback • Listen carefully • Listen actively • Listen empathetically • Be aware of how you are feeling
Listening…. • is a skill we can learn & improve on • is vital to relationships, teams and finding solutions • is both active and empathetic • can turn a negative into a positive • is an important part of giving and receiving feedback