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Dealing with Conflict. An opportunity to act. What is your definition of conflict?. 1.Emotional and intellectual arousal we feel in the face of discrepancy 2.Process in which 1 or both sides consciously interfere in a goal.
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Dealing with Conflict An opportunity to act
What is your definition of conflict? 1.Emotional and intellectual arousal we feel in the face of discrepancy 2.Process in which 1 or both sides consciously interfere in a goal. 3.Painful tension set up by a clash between opposed and contradictory impulses in an individual
Managing Conflict • Awareness: Why is this happening? • Acceptance: Yes, it is really happening. • Analysis: What hill do I wish to die on? • Action: Bottom line: we can agree to disagree agreeably.
Avoidance is really unChristian • We deny our values: what may be at stake is principle; • We may let it escalate: it takes on a life of its own; • We may deny our care for the other: save face at any cost.
Sources of Conflict • Rights • Needs • Interests • Desires • Values
Options for Conflict (Covey) • Win/lose • Lose/win • Lose/lose • Win/win • The question to ask is: how critical is the issue? How important is the relationship?
Strategies • Physical: get a positive emotion: reconciliation, not vindictiveness • Cognitive: Take another look • Rehearse: Prepare for the next conversation • Make up your mind.
We usually have two responses: • Fight • Flight