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Sexual Behaviour

Sexual Behaviour. Chapter 6 Chapter 5: 144-147. Sexual Behaviour. Fantasies actual past experiences, purely imagined experiences, or a mixture of both spontaneously, or be intentional random, during masturbation, or while with partner(s)

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Sexual Behaviour

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  1. Sexual Behaviour Chapter 6 Chapter 5: 144-147

  2. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies • actual past experiences, purely imagined experiences, or a mixture of both • spontaneously, or be intentional • random, during masturbation, or while with partner(s) • less constrained by social consequences than overt sexual behaviour • elaborate or simple • fantasy versus reality

  3. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies Prevalence • college-aged women: 5 times/day • college-aged men 7 times/day • meta-analyses: 95% of people sexually fantasize; on average, same rates for men and women • Winters et al. (2010): women 98.1%, men 99.6%

  4. Sexual Behaviour Fantasies

  5. Sexual Behaviour Fantasies

  6. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies Benefits • safe sexual outlet for exploring sexuality • enjoyment of experiences that are not socially acceptable/permissible • increases sexual arousal • when shared under the right circumstances, enhances sexual experiences • mental rehearsal • better sexual adjustment

  7. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies Potential Negative Outcomes • guilt, shame • intrusive fantasies • fantasies and illegal behaviour • sharing fantasies with an unreceptive partner

  8. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies Rape Fantasies • counterintuitive, given what rape entails • in women, rates range from 31% to 62% • frequently occurring in 9% to 17% • in men, approximately 50% • typically during masturbation and/or intercourse

  9. Sexual Behaviour • Fantasies Rape Fantasies – Theories • blame avoidance – conflicting findings • openenss to sexual experience • desirability • male rape culture (feminism) • biological predisposition to surrender (animals) • sympathetic activation

  10. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation • sexual pleasuring, typically of oneself, through manual stimulation (with partner[s] – mutual masturbation) • Onanism – Onan, the Book of Genesis masturbation and illness: • loss of strength • loss of memory • nervous and mental disorders • loss of vision • impotence • gout • rheumatism • headaches • cancer • sterility

  11. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Reverend Graham – graham cracker to help control sexual urges and desires Dr. Kellogg – control sexual desires with diet of simple foods, especially grains; proponent of devices and bandaging to stop children from touching their genitals

  12. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation • 1972, American Medical Association declares masturbation to be a normal sexual behaviour • 1994, US Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders removed from post: masturbation natural part of human behaviour, should be taught

  13. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation • Catholic Church, in 1999: still morally wrong, but no longer a mortal sin • Seinfeld • UK National Health Service An Orgasm a Day Keeps the Doctor Away! campaign in Sheffield

  14. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Prevalence

  15. Sexual Behaviour Frequency

  16. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Relationships common misperceptions: • people who are in sexually satisfying relationships don’t masturbate • people in relationships who masturbate are sexually dissatisfied with their partners • people who masturbate while in relationships are masturbation/pornography addicts

  17. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Relationships people in relationships who masturbate: • are more likely to be satisfied physically and emotionally with their sex lives • typically have more sex with their partners • are more likely to be better sex partners • may simply be satiating a higher sex drive/needs → mutual masturbation and masturbating for each other

  18. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Relationships • most often reported by female partner • becomes a problem when it starts interfering with the relationship • sex differences in physiological response may be indicative of: relationship problems anxiety laziness boredom fear of rejection poor communication sexual dissatisfaction lack of attraction

  19. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Benefits • sexual self-discovery • release of sexual tension/frustration • resolution of sexual problems • satisfying orgasm • improved affect • in women, relief from menstrual pain • in men, reduced risk of prostate cancer and heart disease • compensation for disparity in couple’s level of sex drive • safe sex

  20. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Women • huge diversity in techniques, including variations in internal/external stimulation areas of stimulation may include (but are not excluded to): perineum anus/rectum clitoris labia vagina

  21. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation Men • generally, some version of stroking the shaft and glans of the penis with hands • circumcised versus non-circumcised • humping pillows, bed, etc. areas of stimulation may include (but are not excluded to): shaft glans scrotum perineum anus/rectum

  22. Sexual Behaviour • Masturbation • masturbation classes • infants/children and masturbation • autoerotic asphyxiation

  23. Sexual Behaviour • Partnered • traditional approach to sex → procreation • role of contraception • women’s rights movement • gay rights movement

  24. Sexual Behaviour • Partnered • sexuality (and preferences) can be fluid • type of relationship • influenced by what the partners bring to it • state of the relationship • can be complex or simple

  25. Sexual Behaviour • Good Sex • should be pleasurable • should make you feel good about yourself • improves relationship(s); oxytocin and dopamine • creativity, excitement, enthusiasm, taking risks • good communication is essential • history with partner(s)

  26. Sexual Behaviour • Good Sex • realistic – takes work • waxing and waning • avoid fixating on performance • confidence • making mistakes is part of the process • sexual compatibility • doesn’t always have to be penetrative • one partner may not be physically able • being the penetrator versus the penetratee

  27. Sexual Behaviour • Being a Good Partner • non-judgmental • secure with one’s own sexuality (and free from embarrassment) • sensitive versus selfish • willing to push boundaries Savage Love: • GGG - ‘good , giving, and game’ • the Campsite Rule • the three Rs

  28. Sexual Behaviour • Initiating • men initiate more than women • historical rules • sexual desire • sex differences in sexual response • problems associated with non-initiation

  29. Sexual Behaviour • Foreplay? • sexting • flirting, eye contact • kissing (lips/other parts of the body) • touching • manual stimulation • oral sex

  30. Sexual Behaviour • Oral Sex • fellatio/cunnilingus • men seem to prefer oral sex (giving/receiving) more than women • can be combined with digital or device penetration • giving versus receiving • what’s in it for the giver? • power • technique • cleanliness/odor • diet • spit versus swallow • facials

  31. Sexual Behaviour • Anal Play and Sex • manual stimulation, analingus and anal sex • anal sex as the new oral sex • fundamental differences from oral and vaginal sex riskiest sex: • presence of bacteria • thin wall tissue • not self-lubricating can be very pleasurable if: well prepared, lots of lubricant, and slow pace

  32. Sexual Behaviour • Same-Sex Partners • paradox: highly restrained by society (still), while unrestrained from stereotypes about heterosexual sex myths: • all men who have sex with men like anal sex • all women who have sex with women dislike penetration

  33. Sexual Behaviour • Pushing Boundaries • threesomes • role-playing • BDSM (bondage and domination, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism) • pegging

  34. Sexual Behaviour • Frequency and Duration • best agreed upon by the couple • married couple (or long-term couple): most commonly 1-2 times per week • preference for everything ranging from a ‘quickie’ to prolonged sessions • most people report sessions lasting 15 minutes to 1 hour • actual penetration – averages from 2 to 7 minutes

  35. Sex Differences men report longer ideal length of intercourse than women, but both would prefer longer than what they’re getting women want more emotional closeness men report wanting sex more often than women both men and women wish they were having more sex Sexual Behaviour

  36. Sexual Behaviour • Sex Differences • men are more likely to want more than one sexual partner than women • women are far more likely than men to judged negatively for having casual sex, multiple partners, and having high sexual desire cougars, feminism, the new female sexuality, and the double-standard

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